During this time, I happened to cross a tunnel and kept on thinking while crawling my way out that “will there be light at the end of the tunnel?” Indeed there was. As I came out and dropped on my knees with my hands raised in air I heard a whisper, “What do you seek?” and the first words which came out of my mouth were “Sarcasm O’ Dear Lord.”

    Laugh out loud as they encounter ‘crocodiles’ on the wall, strange African customs and unintelligible Afrikaans accents. Cringe with them as their visiting in-laws embarrass them in front of their new SA friends.If you enjoyed Educating Rita and Shirley Valentine you will recognise Mavis Turner.Set in the 1970s, But Can You Drink The Water? uses subtle observational humour with an underlying pathos to portray the upsets, hurt and changing family dynamics that emigration brings. (The story is based on a 13-part sitcom) ReviewWith a droll, witty, utterly British voice, this manuscript tackles playfully and sincerely the age-old fish out of water tale. What sustains this book, however, is the narrative voice, the dry and self-deprecating humor, and the ability of this author to tell a story simply and well. Publisher’s Weekly reviewer for the ABNA semi-finals.

    My Man Jeeves 1919Right Ho, Jeeves 1922Death At The Excelsior, Others 1914

    The economy is collapsing, his health is failing, and around his hometown of Broughty Ferry, Bob is struggling to get the respect he deserves. Fortunately his email junk folder is bursting with offers of assistance from around the world. In these genuine emails, Bob Servant looks to the Internet's worst con merchants and charlatans for answers to his many woes. The author of the bestselling Delete This At Your Peril and the critically acclaimed Radio 4 series The Bob Servant Emails is back with an all-new compilation of emails targeting a fresh batch of email spammers—the false lenders who have bravely stepped into the credit crunch, supposed doctors offering expensive treatments for Bob's ailments, and fake foreign soldiers offering him military advice in his campaign against a local bowling club. They all find a man from Broughty Ferry who is ready and willing to give them his valuable time.

    Alexander Armstrong and Richard Osman, two of the world's foremost experts on Things Before Their Time[3] take you on a step-by-step journey through history.From the Big Bang to the Fall of the Roman Empire, from the Ice Age to the Evolution of Language, from Henry VIII to Last of the Summer Wine: all of civilisation is here. A publishing first, this thoroughly comprehensive and highly ambitious quest through Time and Space is interspersed with questions for all the family from TV's most popular tea-time quiz show, Pointless. This is Alexander and Richard's biggest book yet.The book no historian can afford to be without[4], it comes complete with introduction and footnotes[5]. [1] Highly selective[2] Largely cobbled together from what we can remember from school [3] That's not even a thing[4] Under no circumstances to be used for reference[5] Um...

    Who Stole My Spandex? is a witty selection of stories from Doyle’s madcap world of menopausal pitfalls, wardrobe malfunctions, and a family full of pranksters. This clever compilation includes laugh-out-loud pieces like "Queen of Klutz,” "One Size Fits None," and "Hands off my Egg Roll!" From couples' colonoscopies to nightmare holidays to disappearing spandex, no topic—no matter how crazy or unimaginable—is too taboo. With a heavy dose of self-deprecating humor, and a dash of sentiment, this marvelous collection of anecdotes will resonate with anyone who’s ever felt the call of nature at exactly the wrong time. Welcome to the nuthouse that Marcia Kester Doyle calls home.

    Alternate cover edition for B01MU10N5THow can one unwilling human save the galaxy? Can Mark stay alive, defeat a psychopathic reptile whose armies are set to overwhelm all the free civilizations in the galaxy? And will he get the girl of his dreams? Maybe not, but he’ll have a damn good try! And how did he become allied to the most powerful race in the universe?

    Sixty! She feels half that age, even if the mirror tells her otherwise. Hubby Keith promises her a birthday to remember, and doesn’t let her down, but packing his suitcase to shack up with a forty-something isn’t quite the memory Annie wants to make. Suddenly she’s single and – as an empty nester – very, very alone. The Bucket List she and Keith had promised to work their way through is but a dream, until besties Bella and Caz rally around Annie and whisk her away for a trip that will be remembered for ever. Dubai. But it’s not all skyscrapers, bling, sand dunes and sheikhs. As the sun sinks over the horizon of Jumeirah Beach… might there also be love?

    Could any novel be ruder than IS HARRY ON THE BOAT? Possibly this sequel to that brilliantly funny cult novel about holiday reps in Ibiza.

    In the seventy years since, his wit (and the occasional ‘gaffe’) has continued to endear him to the nation, as he travelled the world taking his unique and charmingly British sense of humour to its far-flung corners. Hailed as a god by a tribe in Vanuatu, the Prince has had his fair share of brickbats from the media nearer home, but his outspokenness never fails to raise laughs – and eyebrows.From notorious one-liners to less newsworthy witticisms and from plain speaking to blunt indifference, the Prince does what we all wish we could do now and again – forgets polite conversation and says what he thinks. In the year in which the Prince has stepped down from his royal duties, this joyous and timely book celebrates his wry humour and supremely wicked wit.

    Gary Handler has issues. His boss hates him, his mother hounds him, and his cat thinks he’s an idiot. But that’s okay because Gary’s got the perfect solution to all of life’s troubles: a porn site subscription and his right hand.Sadly, all habits grow old, even the fun ones. Gary soon finds himself at the doorstep of a creepy old pawn shop where he buys a used adult novelty toy to spice up his one-man sex life.Pity for him that it’s cursed by the angry spirits of all the “kids” he’s flushed down the toilet. Needless to say, hairy palms are about to become the least of his worries.----------Jack on, jack off ... with the Jacklight in book 2 of Shingles, the horror comedy series that’s not for those with faint hearts or weak bladders.

    Stuck at a boring family party, on an awkward date, in a below-par job interview, or any number of other situations in which conversation has become more of a trickle than a flow. Well, fear the excruciation no more, as Richard Herring's Emergency Questions is about to change your life. Containing 1,000 conversation starters from one of our most cherished comedians, along with plenty of answers from the many household names who've appeared on his hundreds of podcasts, this book is virtually guaranteed to remove any social anxiety from your life, and will raise your repartee-game to new heights.

    He talks to the models, he reads hundreds of filthy readers' letters, he organises the photoshoots and even gets to direct the action. He has, according to his non-porn friends, "the best job in the world". But Godfrey Bishop has a problem. Godfrey Bishop is going through the sex drought to end all sex droughts. He hasn't been with a woman in over a year and this knee-twisting frustration is magnified a hundred times by his daily grind. He feels like Billy Bunter put in charge of the cake shop, only to have the Atkins diet forced upon him at gun point. Chuck into the mix a twelve girl orgy, a stable of alcoholic co-workers, an angry argumentative feminist, a naked run from justice and an obsessive nutty reader who thinks Godfrey is trying to scupper his chances of marrying the magazine's centre-spread girl and you have Danny King's filthiest and funniest novel yet – according to the back of the book. Godfrey Bishop has "the best job in the world" – and it's doing his f*cking head in.

    It’s about how bringing up kids can be a tough business, but we’re all going through the same things, and it’s easier if we can have a good laugh about it. The book covers a range of themes relevant to modern parents, from pregnancy and potty training to school, sex, and nits. There are fun features like Sex Positions For Parents, quizzes such as Did Our Husbands Really Say That?, and Scummy Mummy Life Hacks.

    However, when James Aden takes up the position of Deputy Agent he does not realise the full extent of what the job entails.He finds himself spending his days negotiating with royalty, farmers, and even wildlife, as well as the imperious Lady Leghorn. In order to survive, James must come to terms with his role quickly, and not let himself get too distracted by Sophie, the pre-college assistant.