I Won't Forgive What You Did: A little girl's suffering. A mother who let it happen


Faith Scott - 2010
    Bewildered by the bizarre and cruel behaviour of her mother and terrified by the violent outbursts of her perpetually angry father, the only certainty in life is that there is none. So when Granddad 'Pop' gives her sweets and does the horrid things he does to her, how is she to know that isn't what all Granddads do? And if it isn't, why does her mother find it funny? Told with honesty and courage, this is the story of a little girl who never stood a chance - who was regularly abused in the most shocking ways by her family and preyed upon by the worst kind of men. Faith went on to have two children in her teens and endured appalling domestic violence but now, after all the suffering, she has turned her life around. Her decades-long journey out of the darkness tells the truth about what happens to abused children when they grow up, in a story that's horrifying and compelling in equal measure.

Not a Proper Child: A true story of abuse, violence and survival against the odds


Nicky Nicholls - 2018
    The brief meeting between these two young women resonates with Nicky. It is a brush with the kind of darkness into which a human life can descend, and an experience that powers her own resolve not to let her abuse define and shape her, but to strive for a positive life of her own. Left as a newborn in a box outside Stoke City Football ground, her grandparents took her into their home. But instead of finding a sanctuary, Nicky was subjected to horrific sexual abuse throughout her childhood. In 1951, when Nicky was six years old, her glamorous-looking estranged mother arrived on the doorstep to `rescue' her. But Nicky's hopes of a safe and loving family were very soon smashed, and her world became darker still... Nicky spent years as a homeless alcoholic, living on the street, in and out of prison before eventually finding a new way forward through her love of art. Now an internationally renowned London artist, hers is a compelling story, carried along by her rare spirit of survival against the odds. This book details an extraordinary woman's rise from the horror of a deeply damaging childhood to a new, creative and independent life. Her story is one of hope, for herself and for other abused children.

City Kid


Mary MacCracken - 1981
    It won the School Library Journal Best Book Award. Another exploration of the very real and painful world of the learning-disabled child.

A Stolen Life


Jaycee Dugard - 2011
    It was the last her family and friends saw of her for over eighteen years. On 26 August 2009, Dugard, her daughters, and Phillip Craig Garrido appeared in the office of her kidnapper's parole officer in California. Their unusual behaviour sparked an investigation that led to the positive identification of Jaycee Lee Dugard, living in a tent behind Garrido's home. During her time in captivity, at the age of fourteen and seventeen, she gave birth to two daughters, both fathered by Garrido. Dugard's memoir is written by the 30-year-old herself and covers the period from the time of her abduction in 1991 up until the present. In her stark, utterly honest and unflinching narrative, Jaycee opens up about what she experienced, including how she feels now, a year after being found. Garrido and his wife Nancy have since pleaded guilty to their crimes.

Tortured


Victoria Spry - 2015
    Instead of protecting, loving and caring for Victoria, she forced bleach and urine down her throat, knocked out her teeth, tied her up naked and made her live in squalor. It took eighteen years of heartache and despair before she found the courage to expose her mum.Tortured is Victoria’s gripping story of survival.

As I Lay Me Down to Sleep


Eileen Munro - 2008
    Then, when their marriage broke down, they failed to protect her from sexual abuse at the hands of a family friend. After watching her adoptive mother drown on inhaled vomit, Eileen and her younger sister were taken into care, but her nightmare was to continue as she was subjected to further physical, sexual and emotional abuse. At the age of only seventeen, seven months into a secret pregnancy, she decided that the only way out was through a bottle of painkillers; when she survived and gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, he became her lifeline.

Trapped in a Bubble: The shocking true story of child abuse, gay bullying and depression (Child Abuse True Stories)


Jack Collins - 2013
    From that house. That street. That place. And his parents. As a troubled teenager - struggling with his sexuality after years of bullying and abuse, including being spat on, beaten, having dog faeces forced into his mouth, and sexual assault - he left home and moved to another city, put together a new life and became a different person, while keeping the 'dead spots' hidden from everyone - sporadic bouts of depression that could wipe out days at a time. But years later, in the aftermath of a disturbing reminder of the past, he begins to unravel, which leads to a move abroad followed by a return to his childhood home. Moving back into that claustrophobic house full of unwanted memories - with his manipulative, controlling mother, and too many reminders of his toxic father - wasn't supposed to be for long, but as the past catches up with him, he heads towards a breakdown and finds himself trapped once again.

Tell Me Who I Am


Alex Lewis - 2013
    Your only link with the past, your only hope for the future, is your identical twin.Now imagine, years later, discovering that your twin had not told you the whole truth about your childhood, your family, and the forces that had shaped you. Why the secrets? Why the silences? You have no choice but to begin again.This has been Alex's reality: a world where memories are just the stories people tell you, where fact and fiction are impossible to distinguish. With dogged courage he has spent years hunting for the truth about his hidden past and his remarkable family. His quest to understand his true identity has revealed shocking betrayals and a secret tragedy, extraordinary triumph over crippling adversity and, above all, redemption founded on brotherly love.Marcus his twin brother has sometimes been a reluctant companion on this journey, but for him too it has led to staggering revelations and ultimately the shedding of impossible burdens.Their story spans continents and eras, from 1950s debutantes and high society in the Home Counties to a remote island in the Pacific and 90s raves. Disturbing, funny, heart-breaking and affirming, Alex and Marcus's determination to rebuild their lives makes us look afresh at how we choose to tell our stories.

Child C: Surviving a Foster Mother's Reign of Terror


Christopher Spry - 2008
    Her home had become a prison where over the course of 20 years she routinely abused and tortured her charges. Behind closed doors she was a sadistic tyrant who beat her children with metal bars, forced wooden sticks down their throats, and made them eat lard, bleach, vomit, and feces. In this harrowing account, one of the victims of Spry’s wrath—known during the trial as Child C—tells the full, shocking story of his enforced isolation and the psychological and physical abuse he endured. Despite years of suffering and abandonment, with his mother now behind bars, today Christopher Spry is a survivor with a zest for life.

Eating the Elephant


Alice Wells - 2016
    In reality, her story offers the reader a rarely told perspective – a mother’s account of the impact of a husband’s devastating addiction to internet child pornography and how this dark world reached right into the heart of her own home.But Alice’s story is about so much more than the impact of sexual abuse. This is not a depressing book. This a fascinating and insightful journey.As a doctor, as well as a wife and a mother, Alice eloquently and intelligently tackles her own complex feelings of bereavement – mourning a man she loved and set up a life with, while slowly having to reconcile herself to the unfolding knowledge of his hidden life as a paedophile. At the centre of Alice’s story lies the wise question that helped her through it all: How do you eat an elephant? How do you face and break down the unthinkable, the insurmountable.And so piece by piece she explores the emotions, the practicalities, the accusations from other parents, the guilt, misplaced feelings of responsibility and the difficulty of finding anyone else who might begin to understand the unspeakably taboo world she now inhabits.Yet through all of this shines her deep love for her children, her optimism, her belief in recovery and her focus on a bright future for them as a family and as healthy, happy, balanced individuals.Despite the rise of extreme internet pornography in this internet-centric, international society and the resulting abuse of children, few are brave enough to talk about the fallout. Alice discovered there is little in place to help the young victims and the adults caring for them to adequately deal with it. But by speaking about these issues – by shining a light into dark places, maybe things can change…

Little Drifters: Kathleen's Story


Kathleen O'Shea - 2014
    For all the children who suffered in this terrible place. For all those I consider my brothers and sisters; the ones who died, the ones who lost their minds, the ones who drown their memories everyday in a bottle of whisky, I tell this for you.Because in the end we are all brothers and sisters – and if we don’t feel that bond of love between each other, just as human beings, then we are nothing. We are no better than the monsters that ran the convents.”Based in Ireland in the 1960s and 70s, Kathleen’s story is a story of extreme hardship, suffering and abuse. It is the story of 11 siblings, abandoned by their mother and torn from their father, incarcerated in convents and then driven apart in the cruellest ways imaginable; it is the story of their ruined childhoods and their fight for recompense. But more than that, it is a story of courage, survival and the incredible strength of sibling bonds against overwhelming adversities.Out of terrible darkness comes a remarkable story. In the tradition of Irish storytelling, Kathleen offers a mesmerising account of her family’s experience.

Nobody's Child


Michael Seed - 2007
    On a daily basis both Michael and his mother would fall under the man’s wrath, and one awful night Michael’s father began sexually abusing his son, a trend that would continue for years. Worse still, the abuse did not stop at home. Once he began school, Michael fell victim to terrible bullying and a teacher who violated him repeatedly. Despite the horror of these years, Michael was ultimately saved by his own will to live, which inspired him to seek a better life as a friar. This is the remarkable story of an individual who, against all the odds, managed to preserve his own dignity and finally escape the horrors of a stolen childhood.

Girl for Sale: The shocking true story from the girl trafficked and abused by Oxford's evil sex ring


Lara McDonnell - 2015
         At the vulnerable age of 13, Lara McDonnell was picked out by a gang of men who befriended her, showered her with attention and gained her trust. Manipulated and groomed, her life quickly spiralled out of control as the men trafficked her around the country, deliberately keeping her compliant with drink and drugs. Deeply disturbed, and frightened about what the gang would do to her if she tried to break free, it would take over 4 years for Lara to find the strength to fight back, flee Oxford and escape her nightmare.     This is her heartbreaking story.

Tiger, Tiger


Margaux Fragoso - 2011
    She is seven; he is fifty-one. When Peter invites her and her mother to his house, the little girl finds a child's paradise of exotic pets and an elaborate backyard garden. Her mother, beset by mental illness and overwhelmed by caring for Margaux, is grateful for the attention Peter lavishes on her, and he creates an imaginative universe for her, much as Lewis Carroll did for his real-life Alice. In time, he insidiously takes on the role of Margaux's playmate, father, and lover. Charming and manipulative, Peter burrows into every aspect of Margaux's life and transforms her from a child fizzing with imagination and affection into a brainwashed young woman on the verge of suicide. But when she is twenty-two, it is Peter -- ill, and wracked with guilt -- who kills himself, at the age of sixty-six. Told with lyricism, depth, and mesmerizing clarity, Tiger, Tiger vividly illustrates the healing power of memory and disclosure. This extraordinary memoir is an unprecedented glimpse into the psyche of a young girl in free fall and conveys to readers -- including parents and survivors of abuse -- just how completely a pedophile enchants his victim and binds her to him.

Unloved: The True Story of a Stolen Childhood


Peter Roche - 2007
    Finding it was like discovering that I really did exist after all . It was as if someone was saying ‘No, it wasn’t all in your imagination, that childhood really did happen, and it happened to you.’ Brought up in South London by violent and abusive parents, the Roche children knew only cruelty, neglect, starvation and squalor. As one of ten and regularly beaten, Peter searched dustbins for food and slept rough when he couldn't face going home. It was survival at all costs, every child for itself. Expelled from school at the age of 14, Peter’s life of petty crime landed him in borstal – and exposed him to yet more sickening abuse.Then, years later, a chance meeting with a social worker led to his discovery of a photograph - a portrait, taken by Lord Snowdon, of a toddler dressed in rags. It was an image that had shocked the world. The boy in the picture was Peter. Unloved is a harrowing account of a shattered childhood, told by a man who has finally found the courage to speak out. This is his story.