The bookstore or library is half full of that kind of crap. What you're holding here is a collection of quips and observations with a refreshingly gloomy, sometimes twisted, always funny take on life. Or lack thereof.With illustrations by renowned artist Brian Andreas, this book is a glimpse inside the humorously askew mind of a writer whose witticisms have been featured on NPR, printed onto t-shirts, performed on stage in Germany, and posted online at the Washington Post, Wall Street Journal, and New York Times. He's been named one of the top funniest people on Twitter by the likes of Maxim, MSNBC and Mashable.

     From the Number 1 Best Selling authors in Computers and Technology, this clear and concise guide will show you how to get the very best from the incredible new $49.99 Amazon Fire 7 Inch Tablet. Step by step instructions will take you from newbie to expert in just two hours! About the Authors: Tom and Jenna Edwards are the Amazon Tech authors behind the Number 1 Best-selling e-books 250+ Best Kindle Fire HD Apps for the New Kindle Fire Owner and Kindle Fire TV User Guide: Newbie to Expert in 1 Hour!

    She is addicted to the feeling of being on stage, looking out at expectant, up-turned mouths, waiting for the first laugh to hit. A first laugh that will not happen unless she creates it. But Brenda is clueless. The on-off girlfriend of a prolific comedian, it is only after she realises his best stage material consists of recycled versions of her own restless, smart-arsed energy that she begins to wonder whether she might be better off keeping her jokes for herself - and so she finds herself making her very first walk to the mark on stage in front of a bare brick wall, with just a spotlight and a PA system for cover, wondering what we all wonder from time to time: am I funny? A book as much about the thrill of performance as it is about what goes on when the microphone is switched off, Brenda Monk is Funny is a blackly humourous and devastatingly candid snapshot of the reality, the brutality and fragility of the comedy industry from an exciting new voice in fiction.

    A look, a tap of the paw, a pose, a movement of the ears: their entire bodies express their emotions and feelings. Get to know your cat better through 50 detailed poses. They will help you understand your cat, but also to establish basic rules in order to live in harmony with him.

    E. Poynor. For less than twenty percent of what you paid for that grande maple-choco-frappa-machacino latte you'll spew out your nose while reading this book, you can learn about an aspect of Alaska most people never think about: everyday life in Alaska. Of Moose and Men: A Skewed Look at Life in Alaska provides a unique insight into the Land of the Midnight Sun, where laughing about the trials unique to the country is better than giving up.

    Soon Gen Xers will be the only cohort of Americans who remember life as it was lived before the arrival of the Internet. They are, as Hennessey dubs them, “the last adult generation,” the sole remaining link to a time when childhood was still a bit dangerous but produced adults who were naturally resilient. More than a decade into the social media revolution, the American public is waking up to the idea that the tech sector’s intentions might not be as pure as advertised. The mountains of money being made off our browsing habits and purchase histories are used to fund ever-more extravagant and utopian projects that, by their very natures, will corrode the foundations of free society, leaving us all helpless and digitally enslaved to an elite crew of ultra-sophisticated tech geniuses. But it’s not too late to turn the tide. There’s still time for Gen X to write its own future. A spirited defense of free speech, eye contact, and the virtues of patience, Zero Hour for Gen X is a cultural history of the last 35 years, an analysis of the current social and historical moment, and a generational call to arms.

    What time is the 3:00 parade? Why does a child need to be 40 inches tall to ride a roller coaster? What happens when the president of France gets lost inside Pirates of the Caribbean? A former employee, or "cast member", at Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom answers these and other questions while sharing humorous stories about working inside the world's most popular theme park."Stories from a Theme Park Insider" takes you inside the park's famous tunnels and backstage for a look at how theme parks really work, and the funny moments and embarrassments that can happen when your work is someone else's vacation.

    A 24/7 non stop medical roller coaster of thrills, pills, and nasty spills. We've got fights, bites, and flashing lights. Think you've heard it all? Think again. Get ready for the all the over the top stories I still don't believe and the patients that come with them.

    Get paid to travel and write about it.Only no one told Jules that it would mean eating oily seabirds, repeatedly falling off a husky sled, getting stranded on a Mediterranean island, and crash-landing in Iran.The exotic destinations come thick and fast – Hong Kong, Hawaii, Huddersfield – as Jules navigates what it means to be a travel writer in a world with endless surprises up its sleeve.Add in a cast of larger-than-life characters – Elvis, Captain Cook, his own travel-mad Dad – and an eye for the ridiculous, and this journey with Jules is one you won’t want to miss.

    

    A collection of 45 ridiculous 911 emergency calls, submitted by 911 Call Center Operators across the U.S.Dedicated to you, the Taxpayer who funded these calls.Note: A quick 10-minute read of humorous quotes from real calls.Just enough for a grin of the day!

    The perfect Christmas gift for the incurably curious* 'Funny and fascinating . . . it's really rather brilliant.' ZOE BALL'Made me chortle.' DERMOT O'LEARY'Fantastic . . . I loved it.' STEVE WRIGHT'The best trivia book of the season.' THE SPECTATOR 'Mind-blowing.' DAILY MAIL 'Genuinely interesting.' POPULAR SCIENCE Which lottery numbers should I pick?Is it true that we are made entirely of stardust?Can dogs tell the time?Why do songs get stuck in my head?If Rome wasn't built in a day, how long did it take?How do you wash a raspberry?What is the most expensive thing on Earth?Where is last Wednesday?These are just a few of the questions put to the QI Elves by the listeners of BBC Radio 2's The Zoe Ball Breakfast Show. In their brand new book, you'll learn their fascinating and frequently hilarious answers.From spiders to stinging nettles, bees to boy bands and twins to thermal undies, you'll wonder why these questions hadn't occurred to you before - but you'll never forget the answers and will want to share them with all your friends.Includes an introduction by Zoe Ball.PRAISE FOR THE QI ELVES' PREVIOUS BOOK FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK . . .'QI have outdone themselves!.' ALAN DAVIES'A cracker of a book.' SUE PERKINS'Genuinely useful and endlessly fascinating.' THE SPECTATOR 'Hilarious.' DAILY MAIL For more from the team behind QI's hit TV show check out the QI FACTS series of books, @qikipedia and listen to their weekly podcast at nosuchthingasafish.com or visit qi.com

    Illustrated with 16 pages of photographs.

    Moving to the countryside of Tennessee, she finds the lifestyle to be ideal except that boredom eventually creeps in. A part-time job leads to discovering the joys of working as a volunteer EMT on an all-volunteer rescue Squad. From farm accidents and angry animals, to redneck fun, loneliness and love, Roxy’s life is unlike anything she ever knew growing up in Georgia. She gets a front seat to stupid things people do, as well as the kindnesses that people are capable of giving to others.

    40 years before the Jamestown colony, the Spanish founded a "Jamestown-type" colony in Virginia. Early explorers met Indians who surprisingly spoke English. Long before 1619 the recognized arrival of slaves, in 1526, the first African slaves were brought to America by the Spanish. A fierce competition arose between France, Spain and England to win the New World. Colonies floundered, were abandoned or destroyed by the English. It wasn’t easy surviving in this “new world” in spite of the early glowing reports. Why did Jamestown and Plymouth colonies succeed when others failed? The 2nd half of this book explores the first successful English colonies of Jamestown and Plymouth and why they succeeded when others could not. Strange and curious facts: the first Indian contact in Plymouth was an Indian asking for a glass of beer! Enjoy a detailed look of what really took place in America’s beginnings. It’s more interesting than your school history books!