The Food Chain


Geoff Nicholson - 1992
    Virgil Marcel is flying to London as a guest of the ancient and mysterious Everlasting Club. Virgil is the obnoxious, spoiled rotten son of Frank Marcel, founder of the Golden Boy chain, Howard Johnson-like restaurants in California; the only work he's done since college is to revamp his father's one fancy restaurant, now the last word in L.A. chic. In London, a black chauffeur, Butterworth, drives Virgil blindfolded to the club, where his host Kingsley, an upper-class twit, explains the club's tradition of ``indulging in excess.'' Virgil eats and drinks with the same swinish abandon as the other members, all male, but gets into trouble when he French-kisses the naked girl who is the motionless table decoration. So begins this story of gastronomic and erotic debauch; Nicholson cuts between England (where Virgil will be kidnapped by the sexy dinner-table centerpiece, then rescued by the God-fearing Butterworth) and California, where Frank, in the course of investigating his wife's supposed infidelity, discovers his prized chef Leo ejaculating into the sauces. Nicholson sustains a tone of campy menace (by now there's a whiff of cannibalism in the air) as he brings all these characters to London in a plot that zigs and zags entertainingly, though with increasing improbability. Even more troubling, though, are the factual accounts of gastronomic and other excesses interspersed throughout. Aside from the borderline tackiness of linking those notorious modern cannibals, the Andean crash survivors, to the high jinks of the club, these passages suggest authorial obsessions run amok. Spicy fare, though some may find the aftertaste disagreeable.

Beaming Sonny Home


Cathie Pelletier - 1996
    Her mother committed suicide, her husband slept with her best friend, and she can't stand her three selfish daughters. But she does love her son, Sonny, who nevertheless plunges her into deep despair when he takes two women and a poodle hostage in his ex-wife's trailer.

The Bad Girl's Guide to Getting Personal


Cameron Tuttle - 2001
    Get real, get close, get Bad with anyone, anytime -- friends, family, lovers, of course, but don't forget your hairdresser, bartender, landlord, dry cleaner, taxi driver, boss, dog, and telemarketer. In her fourth hot how-to for the willfully naughty, reigning Bad Girl Cameron Tuttle dishes out more irreverent, inspiring attitude. Discover when to prune your family tree, when to flirt, and when it's time to start or end a relationship. Special sections such as Can This Relation-ship Be Saved?, Notes to Self, and Personal Power Steering offer hundreds of smart tips and clever tricks with a healthy dose of Bad Girl wisdom. Witty, warm, and packed with sassy charm, this is why being Bad is so darn good.

A Pointless History of the World (Pointless Books Book 5)


Richard Osman - 2016
    Alexander Armstrong and Richard Osman, two of the world's foremost experts on Things Before Their Time[3] take you on a step-by-step journey through history.From the Big Bang to the Fall of the Roman Empire, from the Ice Age to the Evolution of Language, from Henry VIII to Last of the Summer Wine: all of civilisation is here. A publishing first, this thoroughly comprehensive and highly ambitious quest through Time and Space is interspersed with questions for all the family from TV's most popular tea-time quiz show, Pointless. This is Alexander and Richard's biggest book yet.The book no historian can afford to be without[4], it comes complete with introduction and footnotes[5]. [1] Highly selective[2] Largely cobbled together from what we can remember from school [3] That's not even a thing[4] Under no circumstances to be used for reference[5] Um...

Supercute Futures


Martin Millar - 2018
    They founded the global business Supercute Enterprises as teenagers, armed only with a phone, a collection of their favourite cuddly toys and a love of all things kawaii. Thanks to them, the Supercute aesthetic is now a way of life.In a world dominated by massive conglomerates, Supercute has continued to grow bigger and more powerful, morphing from an entertainment company to a ruthless organisation fighting for their right to the world's water.Now Mox and Mitsu face a choice. In a world that is tearing itself apart, who will win in the battle for ultimate control - and where will Supercute draw the line . . .

George, Don't Do That ...


Joyce Grenfell - 1977
    This edition contains all the material in the original volumes of George, Don't Do That and Stately as a Galleon, including the bloodthirsty 'Ethel' and the unforgettable nursery school monologues.

Who Stole My Spandex?: Life in the Hot Flash Lane


Marcia Kester Doyle - 2016
    Who Stole My Spandex? is a witty selection of stories from Doyle’s madcap world of menopausal pitfalls, wardrobe malfunctions, and a family full of pranksters. This clever compilation includes laugh-out-loud pieces like "Queen of Klutz,” "One Size Fits None," and "Hands off my Egg Roll!" From couples' colonoscopies to nightmare holidays to disappearing spandex, no topic—no matter how crazy or unimaginable—is too taboo. With a heavy dose of self-deprecating humor, and a dash of sentiment, this marvelous collection of anecdotes will resonate with anyone who’s ever felt the call of nature at exactly the wrong time. Welcome to the nuthouse that Marcia Kester Doyle calls home.

Unwilling from Earth


Andrew Maclure - 2018
    Alternate cover edition for B01MU10N5THow can one unwilling human save the galaxy? Can Mark stay alive, defeat a psychopathic reptile whose armies are set to overwhelm all the free civilizations in the galaxy? And will he get the girl of his dreams? Maybe not, but he’ll have a damn good try! And how did he become allied to the most powerful race in the universe?

Annie's Autumn Escape


Debbie Viggiano - 2021
    Sixty! She feels half that age, even if the mirror tells her otherwise. Hubby Keith promises her a birthday to remember, and doesn’t let her down, but packing his suitcase to shack up with a forty-something isn’t quite the memory Annie wants to make. Suddenly she’s single and – as an empty nester – very, very alone. The Bucket List she and Keith had promised to work their way through is but a dream, until besties Bella and Caz rally around Annie and whisk her away for a trip that will be remembered for ever. Dubai. But it’s not all skyscrapers, bling, sand dunes and sheikhs. As the sun sinks over the horizon of Jumeirah Beach… might there also be love?

A Million Little Lies


James Pinocchio - 2006
    While there, Mr. Pinocchio meets all sorts of Fascinating Characters, one more Unbelievable and Amazing than the next, and they challenge him to confront his Deepest, Darkest Fears. The experience leads Mr. Pinocchio to the very edges of despair, but at a critical juncture he finds hope in the arms of a Bad Woman.The love affair ends tragically, alas, and, like many parts of Mr. Pinocchio's story, stretches credibility to the breaking point, but the harrowing adventure -- which involves a great deal of pain, a smattering of dirty sex, and endless amounts of girlish crying -- eventually leads to Redemption and Healing. But not for Mr. Pinocchio

Hauling Checks: A Satirical Aviation Comedy


Alex Stone - 2009
    In the industry, I'm known as a "Freight Dog." I fly canceled checks and other types of high-value cargo around the country, mostly at night, in airplanes that are older than I am. Flying freight-or "work" as we call it-in small, twin-engine aircraft is a lesser known side of the aviation world. Our day starts when banker's hours end. Thousands of flights move millions of pounds of work from city to city every night while the rest of the country is asleep. We're out there in the freezing rain getting de-iced when you're laying down for bed. We're sweeping the snow off our wings with a broom at three in the morning. That horrible thunderstorm you heard last night while you were sleeping, we were flying through it. The fog you woke up to in the early morning hours, we were landing in it. Hauling Checks is a comedy about the darker side of aviation. A cast of degenerate pilots, who work for a shady night time air cargo operation, take you on a flight through the unfriendly skies. The pilots abuse every Reg in the book in their quest to make deadlines for their high value cargo. As the company falls on hard times, management resorts to questionable measures to save the failing airline.

Is Harry Still On The Boat?


Colin Butts - 2003
    Could any novel be ruder than IS HARRY ON THE BOAT? Possibly this sequel to that brilliantly funny cult novel about holiday reps in Ibiza.

Make You Mine: A Grumpy Boss Hate To Love Romance (Like A Boss Book 2)


Elyse Riggs - 2021
    

But Can You Drink the Water? (Droll, witty and utterly British)


Jan Hurst-Nicholson - 2010
    Laugh out loud as they encounter ‘crocodiles’ on the wall, strange African customs and unintelligible Afrikaans accents. Cringe with them as their visiting in-laws embarrass them in front of their new SA friends.If you enjoyed Educating Rita and Shirley Valentine you will recognise Mavis Turner.Set in the 1970s, But Can You Drink The Water? uses subtle observational humour with an underlying pathos to portray the upsets, hurt and changing family dynamics that emigration brings. (The story is based on a 13-part sitcom) ReviewWith a droll, witty, utterly British voice, this manuscript tackles playfully and sincerely the age-old fish out of water tale. What sustains this book, however, is the narrative voice, the dry and self-deprecating humor, and the ability of this author to tell a story simply and well. Publisher’s Weekly reviewer for the ABNA semi-finals.

Unusual Ways to Die: History's Weirdest Deaths


James Proud - 2018
    This irreverent little book gathers together some of the most peculiar and outrageous ways that people across the globe have met their untimely ends. Whether shocking or silly, these true stories are proof at least that the grim reaper has a strange sense of humour.