Courageous and life-affirming, this is a mother's final gift to her son. My beautiful son, I so wish that I didn't have to leave you now. But believe me, I tried EVERYTHING I could to stay around for you, and for every moment I could eke out of this life. From the start, it was not a fair fight. My cancer was too big, and too aggressive, and we didn't start on a level playing field. You were fourteen months old and at the beginning I was so full of fierce intention that we could get past this. I would lay you in your cot each night and silently intone from my mind to yours, 'I will do this Freddie, I will gladly take whatever they throw at me if it means we can stay together'. In 2016, beloved broadcaster and journalist Rachael Bland was diagnosed with cancer. Shortly afterwards she made the brave decision to share her story, and she spoke with beautiful poignancy through her blog and podcast, You Me & the Big C. Having been told that she only had a matter of months left to live and writing this in what was sadly her final days, Rachael brings her warmth, courage and humour to the page in this heart-warming and heart-breaking story. Part memoir, part advice, For Freddie beautifully encapsulates the grace and fearlessness in which Rachael lived her life. This is her legacy and an incredible final gift to her son.

    The holder of many records, ‘Baz’ is known for speaking his mind. He talks about growing up loving sport more than anything, getting better and better at cricket (although he was a good enough rugby player to keep Dan Carter out of the South Island Schoolboy rugby team) and his uncertain transition to international cricketer. In this explosive autobiography he opens up on the many controversies he has been involved in, including the Chris Cairns affair and the leadership change from Ross Taylor. He exposes behind-the scenes machinations as well as the private moments of exultation, tumult and despair. One of New Zealand’s and the worlds most admired cricketers, he is credited with changing the face of the game internationally.