The Money-Whipped Steer-Job Three-Jack Give-Up Artist
Dan Jenkins - 2001
After thirty years of waiting for the follow-up, Jenkins returns to the world of big-time golf in The Money-Whipped Steer-Job Three-Jack Give-Up Artist and finds a world where endorsements and course fashion matter more than the side bet. His hero, Bobby Joe Grooves, is a hell-raising two-iron-wielding rogue trying to turn his one annual tournament win and considerable Texas charm into a spot on the Ryder Cup team. Standing between Bobby Joe and his little spot of golf heaven are two ex-wives, a girlfriend, various pious PGA officials, and his embarrassing lack of a career major. A book that will teach you more about golf history than any weepy sunset-over-the-eighteenth-green retrospective, The Money-Whipped Steer-Job Three-Jack Give-Up Artist is an uproarious portrait of what it’s really like to play on the PGA Tour. It’s vintage Dan Jenkins.
Driving Me Nuts!
P.J. Jones - 2011
Every Friday night Ruckus and his roommate Fred sneak out of Shady Grove Home for the Mentally Insane for a ride in their orderly’s convertible. A trip to the used book store and the Dairy Queen is Ruckus’s one little routine among the chaos of pissing all over the lunch trays. There is nothing routine about Apple, another Shady Grove resident who wants to go joyriding with the boys. It quickly becomes obvious she has bigger plans than getting an ice cream cone— plans that could land them in jail or even worse. When their lives are threatened by three angry ex-cons and a crooked cop, it’s up to Ruckus to get his friends back to Shady Grove in one piece. But first, they all need to face reality and confront their tragic pasts. It doesn’t take long for Ruckus to realize that if Apple doesn’t drive him totally nuts, she just may be the one to help restore his sanity."Driving Me Nuts! will surely tickle your funny bone!" Five Stars and Reviewer Top Pick - Diana Coyle, Night Owl Reviews
Magnificent Bastards
Rich Hall - 2008
Meet the man who vacuums bewildered prairie dogs out of their burrows; a frustrated werewolf who roams the streets of Soho getting mistaken for Brian Blessed; a smug carbon-neutral eco-couple; a teenage girl who invites 45,000 MySpace friends to a house party; the author of a business book entitled Highly Successful Secrets to Standing on a Corner Holding Up a Golf Sale Sign and a man whose attempts to teach softball to a group of indolent British advertising executives sparks an international crisis.
Beta Male
Iain Hollingshead - 2010
Sam Hunt faces up to the big three-o, and begins to feel that it might just be the beginning of the end.
BIG HAIR AND FLYING COWS
Dolores Wilson - 2014
To say the least. She calls Sweet Meadow, Georgia, home, where she works for her father doing auto repairs. She also drives the tow-truck, although Sweet Meadow's rather colorful denizens tend to treat Bertie more like the local, free taxi service. You know, someone has to get to a doctor's appointment or pick something up at the dry cleaners. Bertie's favorite day of the week is Friday, when she leaves the wrecker with her father for the whole weekend and joins her friends at the Dew Drop Inn for a night of dancing. Her best friend, Mary Lou, sometimes fixes her up with dubious dates, although Bertie has to remind her friend not to tease her hair too high for those occasions. Like the time when they went to Carrie Sue's open house, and a ceramic cow with angel wings hanging from a ceiling fan locked its hooves into Bertie's big hair and refused to let go. She had to wear it all night, dangling chain and all. Bertie's nearly perfect life is about to take a downhill turn, however. It starts when her landlord, Pete, currently a resident in a nearby nursing home, starts showing up at her house. In his birthday suit. A very badly wrinkled birthday suit. And then she goes to her mailbox, a rubber large mouth bass, and finds a notice from the zoning commission saying she can no longer park the wrecker in her driveway. The notice is signed by George Bigham. But when she goes to the courthouse to take care of her little problem, it is only to discover George Bigham is deceased. And Mary Lou's pregnancy test just came up positive. Can it get any worse? In a word... yes.
Desert Fire: No Rules, No Loyalty, Only the Mission
Phil Campion - 2012
The British Government want ex-Special Forces operative Steve Range, the go-to man for any Black-Ops missions, to lead an ultra-covert mercenary group to seize him from his near-impregnable desert stronghold. Saed is defended by Tuareg warriors armed to the teeth with stolen NATO hardware. If Range's team can somehow overcome them, then they will earn themselves gold bullion worth $500 million. But as the bullets begin to fly and the body count rises, Range realises that he's been double-crossed. Unwilling to lose the gold, he begins to contemplate cutting a deal with the devil.
Days of Fury: Ghost Troop and the Battle of 73 Easting
Mike Guardia - 2021
Within hours, the Kuwaiti defenses collapse under the onslaught of the Iraqi Army. In response, the US military leads a coalition of thirty-four nations in what becomes Operation Desert Storm—a violent campaign to eject the Iraqis from Kuwait. At the tip of the spear are the men of Ghost Troop in the US Army’s 2d Armored Cavalry Regiment.Commanded by Captain Joseph Sartiano, Ghost Troop was among the lead elements of the US VII Corps’ advance into Iraq. On February 26, 1991, Ghost Troop encountered a brigade-sized element of the Tawakalna Division— the elite frontline forces of Iraq’s Republican Guard. Although significantly outnumbered and outgunned, Ghost Troop won a decisive victory with minimal losses to their own ranks. History would call it the Battle of 73 Easting.Based on hours of interviews and archival research by author Mike Guardia, this minute-by-minute rendition of the battle reveals an intimate, no-holds-barred account of modern warfare…as told by the men who lived it."Days of Fury" is their story.
World War 1990: Operation Arctic Storm
William Stroock - 2015
But with the communist advance halted tough decisions lie ahead for NATO. Prime Minister Thatcher and Chancellor Kohl want to counterattack, while the Bush Administration worries about the effects of further war. As NATO deliberates, the United States and Royal Navies gather in the North Sea for a massive offensive against Soviet occupied Norway. In the Soviet Union the Politburo is split between the hawks and doves, and contemplates the unthinkable nuclear option. Its two minutes to midnight in Operation Arctic Storm.
We Run Bad
John Curry - 2018
After abandoning his new home as a lost cause, he's caught up in the poker craze and moves to Atlantic City with a new dream of "playing poker for a living", but soon finds himself stuck in a dizzying spell of bad luck at the card tables. Or maybe he just sucks at poker, like everybody else. His money all gone, and finding that it's actually difficult to drink oneself to death at 1am, he's suddenly offered a chance to make his money back, and then some, by running an underground poker game in New York City. Once in New York, Tim finds himself on the road to recovery and making real money for the first time—but at what cost? We Run Bad offers an authentic and darkly comic look at underground poker culture, while serving up an indictment of post-recession America. Here, every game is rigged, and the only way to come out ahead is to be the one doing the rigging.
The Wellington and Napoleon Quartet: Young Bloods, The Generals, Fire and Sword, Fields of Death
Simon Scarrow - 2015
Arthur, Duke of Wellington, and Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte were adversaries on an epic scale. Across Europe and beyond, the armies of Great Britain and France clashed, from the Iberian Peninsula to India, from Austerlitz to the final confrontation at Waterloo. What drove the two clever, ambitious, determined men who masterminded these military campaigns? How did the underdog from Corsica develop the strategic military skills and the political cunning that gave him power over swathes of Europe? And how did Wellington, born to be a leader, hone his talents and drive an army to victory after victory?From an outstanding historian and novelist come four epic novels, now available in one volume for the first time, which tell the full story of both these men, from their very early days till the momentous battle at Waterloo which decided the future of Europe.INCLUDES MAPS
Driving Jarvis Ham
Jim Bob - 2012
Jarvis may be an all-round irritant, but he's harmless & deep down he's got a heart of gold. As his oldest (& only) friend reflects on his life with Jarvis Ham, he wonders what it would have been like if they had never met.
Clovenhoof's Diary: December
Heide Goody - 2019
Jeremy Clovenhoof has spent six years living the quiet life after losing his job as Lord of Hell and now he’s partying hard because it’s the school holidays. Whether it’s his increasingly complex girlfriend situation, his creative attempts at Christmas on a budget or an over-decorated tree that will take things very personally, Clovenhoof will make this a Christmas for everybody to remember. Join Clovenhoof as he continues his year-long journey to tackle the big issues in life.
The Warlizard Chronicles
Warlizard - 2011
Now I know why my dog likes her better. 2. I wish this were the worst thing she’d ever told me. About the book In “The Warlizard Chronicles”, Warlizard tells the tales of a misspent youth, from the story of his “dog-gasmic” ex-fiancée to the logic of serving as a German linguist in Iraq. The stories are light, fast-paced, graphic, and not remotely safe for work. You have been warned. Reader feedback: - “You tell all women that story? You should wash out your mouth!” - “I think I could listen to your stories for hours.” - “So you owe your marriage to the people who brought down the world trade center?” - “I have nothing else I can add or ask, except MORE STORIES.” - “Holy s**t. I wish I was you.” - “You slept with another man's wife and then lied to him about it, and can say with a straight face it was the right thing to do?” - “Godda***t, I spewed out laughter too loud at work, now I have to leave because everyone knows I'm not doing s**t. F*** this is hilarious, and disconcerting, at the same time.” - “He is the most interesting man in the world.” - “I feel like a failure reading these stories, they're awesome.” - “Your life experience makes me feel good. You good sir are somewhat of a new idol of mine. Nothing much you can do about that. Have a good day sir.” - “Warlizard doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, he prefers Dos Equis.” - “I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that not only a story like this exists but that a Reddit regular would be living it. And it kinda has this enthusiastic ‘and then it happened...’ moments in it that kinda style like you'd write fiction on the go.” - “This guy is either the most creative man in the world or the most interesting man in the world. Either way...”
Girls Don't Poop: Lessons in Anatomy, Hygiene and Sexual Promiscuity
Jen Ashton - 2011
Getting so tall and mature. Why, you can barely recognize yourself from just a few short months ago-back when you were so young. Your body is changing. Changes can be scary. Especially for girls, and, gosh, it can be confusing." Nope. No way. That's not this book. This is NOT your mother's coming-of-age manual. In the comedic likes of Chelsea Handler, author Jen Ashton breaks sex-education tradition and begins her hilariously endearing journey to womanhood with stories of growing up a tomboy in Middle America, circa the 1980's. Packed with iconic pop culture, nostalgic geekery, and a healthy dose of self-deprecation, Ashton foregoes the conventional route of learning how to be a lady and dives right in, enlisting the help of Cosmo, Hustler and her anal-loving housekeeper. Forget dancing around the dutiful explanations passed on from generation to generation-tales of 'the red curse' and 'your changing body.' Ashton's rites of passage are chock-full of unique life lessons learned the extracurricular way. From bodily functions to breast enlargement, pregnancy prevention to purgatory, learn the real facts of life as only she can describe them. If you're lucky, you might even discover the answer to the age-old question: Do Girls Poop? If you thought your journey through puberty was rough, be prepared to finally feel normal. Girls Don't Poop is a jaw-dropping, side-splitting adventure of one clueless tomboy's quest to figure out women, so that she could inevitably become one.
Khushwant Singh's Joke Book III
Khushwant Singh - 1992
Another super collection of naughty and not-so-naughty jokes, humorous anecdotes, comic interludes, hilarious situations and bitchy remarks, selected by Khushwant Singh from amongst the thousands contributed by his readers and fans - and some manufactured by him.