Entering a world of mysterious powers and nightmarish consequences, Chris realizes the secret belief of every teenage boy- that his wang has the power to change the world. The Monkey's Penis is the third installment in the terrifying Shingles series, and once again readers with weak hearts or bladders are advised to read on at their own risk...

    Full of acute observation, uncontrollable humour and a rousing climax.’ - Country Life ‘To his credit Stancomb resists the stereotype of the closed-minded British expatriate.’ - Independent on Sunday - Pick of the paperbacks ‘A thoroughly good read ---An endearing tale of a roller coaster ride.’ - Croatia Online ‘This is not a tale of your usual English couple. This is such a fantastic read ... both humorous and thought provoking.’ - Travellingbookjunkie ‘The author presents this quirky little tale in an honest way, even when he is on the receiving end of a joke. You don’t need to make a break with your past to enjoy this book. It is a fascinating, humorous and totally believable read.’ - Robin’s Reviews ‘A good read. I enjoyed best the humorous bits.’ Tony Rossiter (author of It’s Only a Bloody Game) ‘A good read.’ - Tariq Ali Notes From a Very Small Island is the follow-up to the bestselling ‘Under a Croatian Sun’, which tells the story of a couple upping sticks and leaving their humdrum life in London for blue skies and café life on an island in Croatia. In this second book, the couple continue their attempts to fit in with the village community, but it’s not always easy, and more often than not their endeavours involve them in in hilarious disasters. They also now try to start some projects up, but they have to battle with maddening ex-communist authorities and highly suspicious locals. However, through this, they get to see the crippling legacies that communism and the recent war have left in the lives of their new neighbours. Although largely a light hearted tale, the book is also a heartfelt insight into a community trying to adjust to being members of the EU and the ways of the Western World.

    One of them has to get out. For good...It is the summer of 1999. Bic (half-Irish, half-Scots) is eking out a living selling crêpes to the hordes descending on Greenwich market. With one severed ear, two bizarre deaths and the arrest of his dog for civil disobedience, Bic's year hasn't exactly been going to plan.But when raven-haired Roisin takes the stall opposite his, things seem to be looking up - if Bic can just get past her over-protective brothers. That is, until Bic wakes up the-morning-after-the-night-before, in his clothes, in Edinburgh, to find he's the UK's Most Wanted Man - on the run and with fourteen murders to his name... 'Very fresh, very funny' COLIN BATEMAN'A huge and exciting plot...I loved the twist at the end' Goodreads'Great story and full of humour' Goodreads

    The economy is collapsing, his health is failing, and around his hometown of Broughty Ferry, Bob is struggling to get the respect he deserves. Fortunately his email junk folder is bursting with offers of assistance from around the world. In these genuine emails, Bob Servant looks to the Internet's worst con merchants and charlatans for answers to his many woes. The author of the bestselling Delete This At Your Peril and the critically acclaimed Radio 4 series The Bob Servant Emails is back with an all-new compilation of emails targeting a fresh batch of email spammers—the false lenders who have bravely stepped into the credit crunch, supposed doctors offering expensive treatments for Bob's ailments, and fake foreign soldiers offering him military advice in his campaign against a local bowling club. They all find a man from Broughty Ferry who is ready and willing to give them his valuable time.

    While there, Mr. Pinocchio meets all sorts of Fascinating Characters, one more Unbelievable and Amazing than the next, and they challenge him to confront his Deepest, Darkest Fears. The experience leads Mr. Pinocchio to the very edges of despair, but at a critical juncture he finds hope in the arms of a Bad Woman.The love affair ends tragically, alas, and, like many parts of Mr. Pinocchio's story, stretches credibility to the breaking point, but the harrowing adventure -- which involves a great deal of pain, a smattering of dirty sex, and endless amounts of girlish crying -- eventually leads to Redemption and Healing. But not for Mr. Pinocchio

     "Takes Bridget Jones's mantle and runs with it" Heat Magazine "Made me laugh out loud" Richard Madeley Can Andi Evans find the strength to start again? Betrayed and broken-hearted, Andi's redundancy is one shock too many. Suddenly single and in debt, a summer working in the pretty Cornish town of Rock seems the perfect solution.Determined never to trust again, will a chance meeting with a stranger change her mind? Andi's sister, Angel, is determined to find a man who can keep her in style. Heading to Rock, summer playground of the rich and famous, seems an inspired idea until a misunderstanding threatens to end a romance that has started to mean more to her than she ever expected... Actress Gemma is no stranger to diets and disappointments. As the future of her career hangs in the balance, Gemma hopes a summer in Cornwall solves her problems. With a reality TV show being filmed in the seaside town surely she can avoid the pasty shops and win herself a role. Arriving in idyllic Cornwall, all three girls are hoping for a holiday to remember. But will this be for the right reasons? Or, as emotions run higher than the tide, will the summer escape turn their lives upside down?

    Fiction and Hist. Thrillers★★★★★ 4.7-Star Average Reader Review“...this is storytelling at its best...” -- Fortean Times Magazine“...poignant...heartening...insightful...” -- Kirkus ReviewsWith the rambling pioneers of blues music leading an unforgettable cast of characters, this raw, rousing and adventurous debut novel delivers a breathtaking view of life, livin’, love and hate in America in the 20th century, and the mysterious beginnings of the music that provided the soundtrack for it all...THE BLUES.In 1915, in a moonlit room in a boarding house in Texas, Charlie Patton -- the enigmatic inventor of blues music -- founds a shadowy alliance with Huddie ‘Lead Belly’ Ledbetter and Blind Lemon Jefferson. A pact is made, and the seeds of revolution are sown. Back at the Dockery Plantation in the Mississippi Delta, with the help of the likes of Son House, Howlin‘ Wolf, Robert Johnson, and others, Charlie’s plan spreads across the South, and then across the country. But these bluesmen have no way of knowing where this dangerous road will lead. Nor do they know the Ku Klux Klan is watching.In 2002, Franklyn O’Connor -- an adventurous and penniless youth -- sits at a lonely bar in the train station of his small upstate New York hometown holding a one-way ticket to the Crossroads in the Mississippi Delta. There he hopes to track down his deadbeat father, who walked out on his family when Frank was five. With nothing but his rucksack and the unsolicited assistance of a little old man called Furry Jenkins, Frank soon unwittingly drifts into the middle of a combustible racial feud at the intersection of a still divided society. A shocking truth waiting down the line.An adventurous and powerful novel about how, and more importantly why, from the cotton fields of Mississippi, blues music changed the world, and how the world changed one young man.

    Florida is bad for her head and her hair. She dreams of a dancing career on Broadway and moves to New York, but after a string of failures and mishaps, she realizes that she needs to rethink her grand plan. Finding herself spending way too much time in the comedy club where her future ex-boyfriend works, she nervously goes up onstage one night. People laugh. Not in the places where Mindy thought they'd laugh, but hey, it's a start. Mindy and her friend Ursula Duran, a man-magnet model-slash-actress-slash-deeply troubled woman, soon embark on a wild ride that ricochets from New York's East Side Hotel for Women to the comedy circuit, auditions, photo shoots, film premieres, cable TV specials, Hollywood studios, late-night TV talk shows, and beyond. Surrounded by sleazy agents, sleazier lovers, and Ursula's even sleazier mother, the two find that life writes a few punch lines they weren't expecting...but through it all, they somehow manage to have the last laugh. Rita Rudner has crafted a debut novel that is not just funny, but moving and insightful. With its insider's viewpoint of the world of stand-up comedy, Tickled Pink is also, at its core, a touching tale of love, loss, female friendship, and forgiveness.

    Written by a Telegraph and Guardian journalist and self-confessed running nut, this smartly packaged and brilliantly knowing miscellany details entertaining, real-life runners' stories (being overtaken by a kid/OAP or getting lost while training) and takes a humorous look at the mistakes runners make (wearing a brand new pair of trainers for half marathon or getting so pumped by your morning run you have arguments with everyone at work).

    On the run, he holes up in a sheltered barrio on a bluff above the Pacific Ocean owned by his wealthy but unsympathetic father. Here he meets Sweets, the telepathic dog, laments the loss of Sofia, his madhouse lover, and plays the horses at the Del Mar Racetrack. Eventually he meets up with an old friend, Shelly Hubbard, a fellow horseplayer, record collector/dealer, and hardcore loner, who tells him about his brother, Donny, dead at the age of eighteen from a tragic dive off a thirty-foot La Jolla sea cliff known as the Clam. Eddie discovers a family secret and wants to help, but by then he's already embroiled in the psychotic incident with the Tijuana prostitutes, the madhouse lover, and the police, who are hot on his tail. Mr. Toad's Wild Ride has nothing on Whirlaway, a hilarious novel of escaped mental patients, horseplayers, and record collectors.

    "Roth is better than he's ever been before.... The prose is electric." (The Atlantic)Gil Gamesh is the only pitcher who ever tried to kill the umpire, and John Baal, The Babe Ruth of the Big House, never hit a home run sober. But you've never heard of them -- or of the Ruppert Mundys, the only homeless big-league ball team in American history -- because of the communist plot and the capitalist scandal that expunged the entire Patriot League from baseball memory.

    A story that has captured the hearts and minds of sports fans throughout the world. Feel every blow and unearth the answer to the all-important question...What ever happened to Ivan Drago?

    And she's seen how a simple message of hope uplifts a life that's left in tatters.In these pages you'll find a daily dollop of Barbara's favorite jokes, heartwarming stories, witty cartoons, and heartache-survival strategies. Share a moment each morning with the Geranium Lady, and soon you, like Barbara, will realize you've been "blessed to be a blessing."

    That was, of course, because they didn’t know that Camp Tekonichia was home to boundless spirit energy, three very bored ghosts, and a powerful magic spell on the verge of completion. Now, these three will have to race against time and an ancient evil trying to stop the whole world from turning into a haven for restless spirits. Aided only by a mysterious medium and the camp’s resident ghosts, none of them have a clue how they’re supposed to save the world. Especially since they only have until sunrise to do it.

    Regardless of religion, race, sex, sexuality or nationality. He hates all of you. Basically, you are fucked." God is pissed off. He has run out of patience with humans and decided that our time is over. We've had our chance and its back to the drawing board. "Fuck the lot of them" is his newest gospel. Mo, and Jay, best Friends who've fucked up in the past, beg him for one more chance to get the humans back on track. Alongside Mr Saluzar, the head of a global charity foundation, and Nick, The Fallen Angel, they hurtle towards Armageddon and their one chance to prove God wrong. They have seven days to save us. On The Seventh Day contains strong language and religious irreverence which some may find offensive. Irreverent dark humour from the author of Lanarkshire Strays and the dEaDINBURGH series.