The Robinson Family -- mother, father, two teenage sons and a six-year-old daughter who is everyone's favourite -- are a typical Christian family -- or are they?.

    The ex who can't stop talking about the French girlfriend who dumped him. The cute young bartender who knows how to make a Manhattan straight up. And, of course, Mr. Right—who looks like Liam Neeson, writes poetry like e.e. cummings, plays the guitar like Jimmy Page. Until he turns out to be a complete and total jerk.Narrated in 781 chapters—The List is an irresistible look at love, dating, friendship, sex, cats, thongs, and shopping. And a story that's as pleasurable, as interesting, as gossipy, as truthful, as reassuring, as compelling, as sane, as necessary as a late-night phone call to your best friend ever. Pour a cup of tea, curl up on the couch, and read to your heart's content.

    A fascinating historical document has now emerged which shows that there were indeed rules and in 1973 they were recorded on paper by none other than DCI Gene Hunt himself.Divided into ten sections, The Rules of Modern Policing - 1973 Edition covers everything from interrogating suspects and undercover operations to driving and dress code. Several of the rules are illustrated with diagrams, and photographs of DCI Hunt himself illustrate the more physical parts of the job: how to hit suspects so you don't leave a mark; how to signal the importance of your arrival by crashing into inanimate objects (cardboard boxes are a perfect example here - lots of noise; no damage to your motor); how to roll over the bonnet of your Cortina without making a dick of yourself. Completing the book is an invaluable glossary of police terms, covering everything from blag to lag, and nonce to ponce.An essential reference work for fans of Life of Mars, The Rules of Modern Policing offers a unique insight to seventies' law enforcement that will make you laugh until you cry like the wet little turd you are.

    Apparently it’s fine for Scrimshaw Travel to make last minute amendments to the holiday without incurring any penalties or reducing the price in any way. That’s what the indifferent courier tells him on day one of the tour as she arrives in a clapped-out, old coach being driven by a partially-sighted driver. With the spa hotel replaced by a rundown guest house staffed by a neurotic manager, decrepit waitress and under-sexed, Italian waiter there doesn’t appear to be much of the brochure-described holiday left. Thank goodness for Angela, the rather lovely woman Derek pals up with on the journey down. She might just make the trip bearable. If only the other members of the group would leave them alone long enough to get to know each other, but Derek has always had the ability to attract the eccentric characters to him and he can’t escape them. Still, perhaps they’ll surprise him as he learns about their lives and secrets as they move from one hilarious excursion to another. And maybe Angela will provide one or two surprises herself. Driven to Distraction is a fun romp through the English countryside with characters finding love and friendship while travelling at twenty miles an hour. (Well, it is a clapped-out, old coach).

    Nazi skinheads are cruising the streets and a millionaire tycoon and a weather girl have been kidnapped. It falls to Barry Osgathorpe to discover who is responsible.

    Can sit naked in front of book without fear of radiation 9. Reader not distracted by Dave's awful haircut 8. Can be readily enjoyed in Amish households 7. If you fall asleep while reading the book you won't wake up to fat weather guy wishing Happy Birthday to one hundred-year-olds 6. Can use your imagination to picture lists being read aloud by handsome actor George Peppard 5. Origami! Origami! Origami! 4. Can be enjoyed by inmates who have lost their TV privileges 3. Carrying book around proudly announces to rest of world, "I can read large print!" 2. Easier to shoplift than 26-inch Trinitron Stereo Sony 1. Any book is better than Dave's TV show

    First responders share unique baby names, we hear stories about clueless newbies, bitter veterans, and patients with good intentions but bad ideas. We also hear more about the not-so-happy side of this industry. Grab a blanket, a mug of hot chocolate, and cozy up in front of the fire to catch up with submissions from people like you!

    This charmingly funny, self-deprecating resumé of an ordinary man’s career to date and current life in the celebrity bear pit is penned by the author of the Sunday Times-bestselling Where Did It All Go Right?

     This is the dark but humourous tale of Sarah Pemberton, who is not a happy woman. A down to earth, inventive soul who despises her stuck up pompous husband Neil, who believes he is much more intelligent and important than she is. When he refuses her a divorce and emotionally blackmails her into staying with him by threatening to take custody of their daughter, she's decides to make life a little more entertaining for herself, by subtly torturing him at every available opportunity. Creative and adaptable by nature, with a wicked sense of humour, she comes up with more and more ways to ridicule him, without him ever knowing she has a hand in it. ...."During 1993-1994 amongst other things, I cooked him a meat pie with pedigree chum; Stole his car more times than I can count; put chilli powder in his underpants, sent a stripagram to his work (a fat one), and subscribed him to a gay porn mag! (Our paperboy avoided him like the plague after that.)"..... Finding accomplices in the form of her Aunt May, who lives in a crumbling old former hotel which was damaged during WWII, and May's two lodgers, a shy young hippy named Darren, along with his brother Matthew a former life model, they try to get rid of her husband by either 'Plan A', which consists of 'frame him for a crime so that he gets incarcerated', or 'Plan B' drive him to a nervous breakdown. Both plans are designed to discredit Neil in case of a custody battle for their daughter. There is only one little prerequisite for every little torturous idea though, and that is, IT HAS TO MAKE THEM LAUGH! Unbeknown to Sarah at first, she isn't the only one with a vendetta against her husband, his entire workforce hate his guts and exploit any opportunity to make him look bad. When plans A & B go disastrously wrong, Sarah and co set their sights on a new target, her in-laws. Interwoven throughout the story is the tale of Aunt May, the lynch pin of her little make shift family, who harbours secrets of her own that go back to the night the bomb fell on the east wing of the hotel. This is not a tale of a submissive woman suffering at the hands of abuse; this is the tale of a strong courageous woman having one last laugh at other people's expense. Contains very occasional strong language, and scenes that should not be repeated at home. Volume One of 'The Cuckoo' series