Purchase includes a free trial membership in the publisher's book club where you can select from more than a million books without charge. Chapters: Still Life With Woodpecker, Villa Incognito, Fierce Invalids Home From Hot Climates, Jitterbug Perfume, Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, Skinny Legs and All, Another Roadside Attraction, Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas. Source: Wikipedia. Free updates online. Not illustrated. Excerpt: Still Life With Woodpecker (1980) is the third novel by Tom Robbins, concerning the love affair between an environmentalist princess and an outlaw. As with most of Robbins' books, it encompasses a broad range of topics, from aliens and redheads to consumerism, the building of bombs, romance, royalty, the moon, and a pack of Camels. The novel continuously addresses the question of how to make love stay. The story is sometimes called a post-modern fairy tale. The book begins in "the final quarter of the twentieth century," at a year never specified, presumably in the early 1980s. It revolves around a family of deposed European royalty living in a small house in the suburbs outside of Seattle, under the protection of the CIA. They consist of: the father, King Max, a former gambler and poker player whose prosthetic heart valve makes a loud scraping noise when he gets excited; the mother, Queen Tilli, an opera-lover with a strong foreign accent and a fondness for saying "Oh, oh, spaghetti-o"; Gulietta, the non-English-speaking maid (and, as it turns out, Max's half-sister) and the daughter, Leigh-Cheri, a redheaded vegetarian liberal princess and former cheerleader, having pulled out of classes after being asked to resign from the cheer squad after having a miscarriage while cheering at a football game. Leigh-Cheri proclaims herself celibate, withdraws from public life and cloisters herself in her room, only to emerge to ask her parents for permission to go to the Care Fest, a lib...More: http: //booksllc.net/?id=217300

    Instead, they'll have to settle for Cucumber, a nerdy magician who just wants to go to school. As destiny would have it, he and his way more heroic sister, Almond, must now seek the Dream Sword, the only weapon powerful enough to defeat Queen Cordelia’s Nightmare Knight.Can these bunny siblings really save the world in its darkest hour?Sure, why not?

    Archie 1000 Page Comics Bonanza collects 1000 pages of new and classic Archie tales in our biggest collection ever, with over 100 full-color stories featuring America's favorite red-head and friends navigating the pressures and pratfalls of teenagers everywhere!

    Earth has been remade into a lush, thriving ecosystem, but with a new dominant species: the machines.These massive, animal-like robots fill the lands, oceans, and skies, serving as the guardians and enforcers of the revived natural order.New generations of humans formed into pre-industrial tribes, without knowledge of the doomed civilization that preceded them, that of the "Old Ones" – us.Little did they know that threats from the ancient world persisted, the greatest of which was HADES, a mysterious A.I. bent on wiping out all organic life. Bolstered by an army of misguided zealots and corrupted machines, it launched a massive assault on humanity's largest tribe.After a desperate battle, HADES was defeated by Aloy, the greatest machine hunter of her age, and a coalition of faithful allies at the city of Meridian.Now Talanah, one of Aloy's closest confidantes and the newly appointed Sunhawk of the Hunters Lodge, seeks a moment of respite after the epic struggle.

    Damn, now I sound stupid, too." -Bomani Jones, ESPN "It's great, and I have no idea what just happened, but Jerry Jones dick exploded and that's enough for me." -Spencer Hall, SB Nation "The only parody Twitter account worth following" -Deadspin.com "This is the least influential book of anything I've ever read. I hated it." -Adolf Hitler In what is being hailed by many, probably, as the best, funniest, most gut-shittingly poignant literary work since The New Testament, PFT Commenter takes you on a realistic-fiction journey through the backdoor politics of today's NFL. Set in the 2014 offseason, Roger Goodell and President Barack Obama become locked in a mano a mano battle over the future of the Dallas Cowboys, culminating in a literal fight to the death. Starring NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, Barack Obama, Mike Ditka, Joe Biden, Michael Vick, Peter King, Ron Jaworski, Dan Snyder, Robert Griffin III, Danny Woodhead, J.J. Watt, Jerry Jones, Russell Wilson, Pete Carroll, and many more of your favorite NFL stars and media personalities; "Goodell vs. Obama: The Battle for the Future of the NFL" will take you on a journey that any NFL fan is sure to love, or at least not hate. WARNING: Told through the narrative eye and screaming mouth of an uneducated internet commenter, this book is filled with grammatical errors. It was written by a someone who was raised on scorching hot sports takes, light beer, and an undying love for Roger Goodell. He cares about TELLING, not about spelling. If that's going to be a problem,, there's the door.

    When she goes to look for her, she comes across a gory sight: her entire family being devoured by a nine-tailed fox. Yun Hee survives with supernatural help, but when she wakes, the fox demon is by her hospital bed, wearing her sister's body.Years later, Yun Hee is living in Seoul as a mudang, a shaman in the traditional Korean Muist religion, and she's still looking for her sister. Scarred inside and out, Yun Hee is prickly and friendless, which makes the advances of Alex, an American Christian missionary, all the more unwelcome. But Yun Hee is still looking for Sun Hee, and Alex may be the bridge between them.

    Mike Mignola returns to draw Hellboy's ongoing story for the first time since _Conqueror Worm._ It's a story only Mignola could tell, as more of Hellboy's secrets are at last revealed, in the most bizarre depiction of Hell you've ever seen. * Mike Mignola writes and draws the next phase of Hellboy's story. * Dark Horse horror gets under your skin! **Death was only the beginning!**

    She lost her job. And her apartment. In the same day. But it's okay, her friend has a cozy storage unit she can crash in. And there's bound to be career opportunities at the neighborhood laundromat— just look how fast that 12-year-old who runs the place made it to management! Plus, there's this sweet guy at the community center, and maybe Penny can even have a conversation with him without being a total dork. Surely Penny is a capable of becoming an actual responsible adult, and if she can do that her luck’s bound to change! Right?

    Dynamite proudly presents "Frank Cho's Jungle Girl"!In this issue, Dynamite introduces readers to an original 8-page story, overseen by co-writer and artist Frank Cho and infuses the issue with everything Cho fans want to see - beautiful women, thrilling adventures, and, of course, dinosaurs! Co-writer Doug (Red Sonja: QUEEN OF THE FROZEN, The 'Nam) Murray is along for the ride as is series artist Adriano (NBSG: ZAREK, Red Sonja) Batista as they bring the Jungle Girl to life!Featuring a cover by Cho, this issue #0 is a must-have!

    even as every step she takes draws her deeper into the dangerous underworld of the city.

    The humans are gone, the sun is rarely seen, and a cold, dark rain befouls everything it touches.The mice, long dependent on humans for food, stubbornly cling to their old ways, looting the nearby abandoned houses for any scraps they can find. Once, there was plenty to eat, but now the scavengers return empty-handed, or not at all.Food is scarce, but danger is everywhere, in the form of poison, traps and-- worst of all-- cats. This gang of feral predators relentlessly hunt the mice whenever they leave the safety of their nest.As supplies run low and many mice fall ill, desperation creeps in. With the colony at a breaking point, rumours of a wrecked truck filled with food give them hope, but it lies far beyond the forest, where even the cats won’t go.Now the colony’s best scouts, including the brave Wix, embark on a dangerous journey to save the colony, but beyond the lawns and fences of the neighbourhood lurk far worse things than stray cats…www.scurrycomic.com

    When the barbarian with the lowest IQ in the world starts passing out words of wisdom and advice, all of his old cohorts and enemies come out of the woodwork to find out what's wrong, and no one's more confused than Rufferto, the most loyal little dog in Plentia.

    Howard's stories about Conan the Barbarian.These stories were originally published in Weird Tales magazine between 1933 and 1936.The Conan stories included in the collection are:1. The Frost Giant's Daughter (Gods of the North)2. The Tower of the Elephant3. Rogues in the House4. Shadows in the Moonlight (Iron Shadows in the Moon)5. Black Colossus6. Queen of the Black Coast7. The Slithering Shadow (Xuthal of the Dusk)8. A Witch Shall Be Born9. The Devil in Iron10. The People of the Black Circle11. Shadows in Zamboula (Man-Eaters of Zamboula)12. The Pool of the Black One13. Beyond the Black River14. Red Nails15. Jewels of Gwahlur (The Teeth of Gwahlur)16. The Phoenix on the Sword17. The Scarlet Citadel18. The Hour of the Dragon (Conan the Conqueror)As an added bonus, also included in the set are:Cimmeria—A PoemThe Hyborian Age—Conan's World (This is Howard's background essay on the world of Conan)For ease of navigation, the anthology includes an interactive table of contents. The stories in this collection are ordered roughly in chronological order from Conan's first adventures as a young mercenary adventurer and thief to his final epic clashes as a king and are based on the Rippke chronology.About Conan:Conan the Barbarian (also known as Conan the Cimmerian) is a fictional sword and sorcery hero who originated in pulp fiction magazines and has since been adapted to books, comics, several films (including Conan the Barbarian and Conan the Destroyer), television programs (cartoon and live-action), video games, role-playing games and other media. The character was created by writer Robert E. Howard in 1932 via a series of fantasy stories published in Weird Tales magazine.Conan the Character:Conan is a Cimmerian. From Robert E. Howard's writings (The Hyborian Age among others) it is known that the Cimmerians were based on the Celts or Gaels. He was born on a battlefield and is the son of a village blacksmith. Conan matured quickly as a youth and, by age fifteen, he was already a respected warrior who had participated in the destruction of the Aquilonian outpost of Venarium. After its demise, he was struck by wanderlust and began the adventures chronicled by Howard, encountering skulking monsters, evil wizards, tavern wenches, and beautiful princesses. He roamed throughout the Hyborian Age nations as a thief, outlaw, mercenary, and pirate. As he grew older, he began commanding larger units of men and escalating his ambitions.

    But can he teach the young K'un-Lun native how to fit in at a New York City public school? And what about all the mysterious monsters that keep trying to destroy New York? Trouble is coming, but thank goodness this city is big enough for both Iron Fists, because it's gonna need them! Get ready for an action-packed tale with twice the Iron Fists: crushing demons and crushing on classmates.Collecting: Iron Fists #1-6

    Armies are being raised and targets being set. All that stands between life and chaos are Alice Blood and a handful of unsuspecting federal agents. The war between the living and the undead has begun!