And how can that get any worse for this Wimpy Kid? By finding out that you’re getting the meanest teacher in the school this year AND she just moved down the street.Leave it up to Connor, Max and Milo to turn the miserable first week of school into the biggest and most exciting party ever. All while avoiding the bully squad, outsmarting Molly, the teacher’s pet and staying one step ahead of Mr. Mooger, the principal.But everything is not as it seems and the three soon find out that they haven’t been the only one’s pulling pranks.Join Connor, Max and Milo on their new adventures in middle school, watch them out smart the bullies and stay one step ahead of the teachers. This illustrated book is a humorous and fun ride through middle school, never knowing what's just around the corner or under your seat. Connor's Diary of the Wimpy Kids in his prankster's club will keep you guessing and laughing out loud.Also Available: The Pranksters' Club: Ripped - Book 2 of the Series

    Or does it? With a change of perspective, Bella comes to realize that every cloud has a silver lining...and maybe today is a wonderful day after all!

    Why not try some microfiction short stories instead? These bite-sized, slice-of-life short stories are crafted with only one hundred words, so they go by in a flash. Perfect for time-challenged fiction lovers, these humorous yet thought-provoking stories can be read when you’re waiting in line, riding the bus, or whenever you need a short mental break. Go on. Try some flash fiction. Grab your copy of 100 Tiny Tales today! 100 Tiny Tales: Short Stories Told in Exactly One Hundred Words is written by K. Kris Loomis, a native South Carolinian and the author of the novels, The Sinking of Bethany Ann Crane and The Murder of Leopold Beckenbauer, as well as the short story collection, The Monster In the Closet and Other Stories. Kris is also a nonfiction author who writes books about yoga, meditation, and the time she spent living in South America, including After Namaste: Off-the-Mat Musings of a Modern Yogini and Thirty Days in Quito: Two Gringos and a Three-Legged Cat Move to Ecuador. When Kris isn’t at her standing desk writing, she can be found playing chess, folding an origami crane, or practicing a Beethoven sonata on the piano. She lives in Rock Hill, South Carolina with her husband and two cats. You can connect with Kris at her website, www.kkrisloomis.com or her Amazon Author page, or find her on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram @kkrisloomis.

    When four friends set out on a canoe trip down Milligan Creek during spring runoff season, little do they realize their voyage through small town Saskatchewan is about to turn into one of the wildest experiences of their lives--if they survive!Facing raging rapids, frigid "icebergs," spinning whirlpools, roaring culverts, and their own recklessness, soon the boys find themselves in uncharted waters with no clue how they're going to get home.With night falling fast and no one to rely on but each other, the boys must figure out how to work together or risk falling victim to the merciless powers of nature--and their parents' wrath!

    And while this world would be dangerous at any time, Milly has arrived at the worst possible moment. Because a soul auction is in town. Drawing the worst of the worst from all seven worlds, the soul auction is a center for demons who want to trade the souls of mortals. Lost and alone, Milly is soon taken under the wing of a mysterious werewolf named Duncan and his enigmatic associate Matilda. When she's forced to choose between the pair of them, however, Milly finds herself dragged into a series of terrifying encounters as she and the others get ever nearer to the vast, once-in-a-lifetime gathering that's about to take place nearby. If she wants to get home, Milly must enter the soul auction and face a deadly creature. And if she wants to live, she must uncover the terrifying truth at the soul auction's heart. ONE NIGHT AT A SOUL AUCTION is the story of a little girl who finds herself trapped in another world, and of a werewolf's attempt to gain revenge for the death of his sister.

    Mike and his cousin, Salvatore “Sally-Boy” Boccanera are born one minute apart, in the same hospital, and it seems like they’ll never be more than a minute apart the rest of their lives. Their experiences knocking around the city are challenging, funny, touching, and at times disturbing—all of the ingredients that define growing up. Life lessons happen in the Italian bakery Sally-Boy’s father owns, where the boys loll and play, with ears and eyes wide open. But maybe the biggest lesson of all looms over Mike’s father, who’s determined to make drastic changes in pursuit of a better life. Hanging in the balance, at the center of the boys’ tumultuous lives, is the fire escape. It’s a place that is uniquely theirs, and Mike best describes its spell, recalling how it reeks in the rain, blisters in the sun, and ices over in the snow. It’s where he and Sally-Boy talk and think and philosophize and plot and try to understand all they can about themselves and the world.

    Introduce your children to a great message about accepting people for who they are. Great for bedtime!Bestseller Rankings:#1 in Kindle eBooks > Children's eBooks > Animals > Pigs (01/11/12)#1 in Books > Children's Books > Animals > Pigs (01/11/12)

      It is also full of useful things that will help organize your year, including dates, numbers, and pictures of dogs.

    Brought into the life of knights, fair maidens, and kings, Conner finds himself outcast and alone. But under the tutelage of an old man from a far-off land, Conner begins to learn skills that even the fabled Knights of Karmon could not match. But as the nefarious plans of the evil Lord Neffenmark come to fruition, he finds himself embroiled in the deadly politics and forces far beyond the borders of his little kingdom. Knight Fall begins the first chapter in the life of Conner, a simple peasant who dares to affect change upon the world.

    That's not how the story goes. But this slug is convinced he is royalty. He can prove he is. Oh, sure. All he needs is a kiss, of course. And he'll beg and plead with readers to give him one. But who would kiss a slug? This little slug may be trickier than he looks, though. This hilarious book will have your children all in giggles. They'll simply love the surprise ending that not even Mommy or Daddy will see coming.

    Open at your own risk. Sarah and Tommy have the same kinds of problems as most any ten-year-old girl and six-year-old boy. Homework, bullies, Dad not going in to work since Mom ran off to fuck the postman. That sort of thing. But they're not going to take their problems lying down. After a quick bus ride into town to buy a gun, they think their problems are all but solved. That is, until a creepy weirdo follows them into an alley. But they aren't the only ones in that alley. What they discover will make you soil your pants in terror. It will make your skin crawl. It might even give you... Shingles.

    Entering a world of mysterious powers and nightmarish consequences, Chris realizes the secret belief of every teenage boy- that his wang has the power to change the world. The Monkey's Penis is the third installment in the terrifying Shingles series, and once again readers with weak hearts or bladders are advised to read on at their own risk...

    Large, beautiful and rather lonely. He tries hard to make friends but, being so high up, he appears aloof and distant. Something has got to give, and in a little time it does! Discover how Balloon ends up happier, if somewhat changed ... ---- The full cover spread illustration, of the paperback edition, is included as a bonus

     Barry Sullivan is a sordid dentist who resorts to blackmail to keep his string of married women compliant. But now Cullen has toothache - and a very different interpretation of the dental code of practice. The Tartan Hiaasen strikes again with another tale which roars along - and which will have you roaring along with it. This laugh-out-loud novella is a prequel to the highly entertaining CULLEN series of full-length novels.

    Gary Handler has issues. His boss hates him, his mother hounds him, and his cat thinks he’s an idiot. But that’s okay because Gary’s got the perfect solution to all of life’s troubles: a porn site subscription and his right hand.Sadly, all habits grow old, even the fun ones. Gary soon finds himself at the doorstep of a creepy old pawn shop where he buys a used adult novelty toy to spice up his one-man sex life.Pity for him that it’s cursed by the angry spirits of all the “kids” he’s flushed down the toilet. Needless to say, hairy palms are about to become the least of his worries.----------Jack on, jack off ... with the Jacklight in book 2 of Shingles, the horror comedy series that’s not for those with faint hearts or weak bladders.