Damn, now I sound stupid, too." -Bomani Jones, ESPN "It's great, and I have no idea what just happened, but Jerry Jones dick exploded and that's enough for me." -Spencer Hall, SB Nation "The only parody Twitter account worth following" -Deadspin.com "This is the least influential book of anything I've ever read. I hated it." -Adolf Hitler In what is being hailed by many, probably, as the best, funniest, most gut-shittingly poignant literary work since The New Testament, PFT Commenter takes you on a realistic-fiction journey through the backdoor politics of today's NFL. Set in the 2014 offseason, Roger Goodell and President Barack Obama become locked in a mano a mano battle over the future of the Dallas Cowboys, culminating in a literal fight to the death. Starring NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, Barack Obama, Mike Ditka, Joe Biden, Michael Vick, Peter King, Ron Jaworski, Dan Snyder, Robert Griffin III, Danny Woodhead, J.J. Watt, Jerry Jones, Russell Wilson, Pete Carroll, and many more of your favorite NFL stars and media personalities; "Goodell vs. Obama: The Battle for the Future of the NFL" will take you on a journey that any NFL fan is sure to love, or at least not hate. WARNING: Told through the narrative eye and screaming mouth of an uneducated internet commenter, this book is filled with grammatical errors. It was written by a someone who was raised on scorching hot sports takes, light beer, and an undying love for Roger Goodell. He cares about TELLING, not about spelling. If that's going to be a problem,, there's the door.

    Love and Rockets is a body of work routinely praised for its realism, complexity, subtlety and ethnic authenticity. It was the first comic series to give a voice to minorities and women in the medium's then 50-year history. One of the hidden treasures of our impoverished culture. --The Nation

     The chemtrails brought them back to life. When the end came, it was swift and brutal. The EMP from atmospheric detonations occurred just before Christmas. Chinese bombs spreading poison on major metropolitan centers follow, only hours later. Then the dead began to walk… and to kill with terrifying speed. The government, from the President to the foot soldier, fell in three days. Nine out of ten – maybe more – were dead before Valentine’s Day. Only a hardy few, those who were had prepared for the worst, lived long enough to see what happened next. Winchester: Over tells the stories of the many who fell and the handful who survived. It follows former motor-cop Bexar Reed and his family, along with their lifelong friends and fellow preppers, as they fight their way to relative safety in rural Texas… and the story of a highly trained government agent who has to fight his own way out of an infected airport, to the last barely functioning military installation, hidden beneath the ground at Area 51. They are stories of courage and combat, guns and battle tech, the secret history of humanity, ancient artifacts and the Nazi occult, and always, always, the ravenous walking dead, as the last brave humans teeter on the edge of extinction. The “reanimates” relentless destruction of civilization is only the beginning. The bestial remnants of humanity are only one shuffling step behind. "If you shook this book, gunpowder and testosterone would fall out." -Chris Philbrook, Author of Adrian's Undead Diary Look for Prey, Book 2 of The Winchester Undead, coming in June 2015. And learn more about Dave Lund, his work, and his world view at www.winchesterundead.com

    But alas! He has no money to do so! Will Deepu end up disappointing his brother? Find out in The Fancy Dress.• Suppandi’s employer rewards him for his honesty when he returns the five rupee note he found. But what will happen when Suppandi continues this honest behaviors? Get ready to laugh with The Adventures of Suppandi: Self Help.• Being around people who love to boast about themselves can be annoying. But what do you do when you’re forced to travel with one of them? Find out what a man does when he is repeatedly slighted by the Proud Man in the Train.• Hodja’s friend just wants some peace and quiet to meditate. But the fascinated villagers won’t let him be! What clever scheme will Hodja come up with to help his friend in Money Power?

    

    But how do the citizens really feel about a system where they are powerless? America Jara and Bennett Beeny grow up as best friends, living a fairly trouble-free life in a dangerous city… bar the odd encounter with a Judge. Time draws them apart, and when they are brought back together, Beeny is a successful singer and America has become involved with a terrorist organisation – with the Judges in its sights! Written by John Wagner (A History of Violence) with art by Colin MacNeil (Judge Dredd: The Chief Judge’s Man) this dark and complex tale is a true 2000 AD classic!

    Portsmouth, England. A global particle physics experiment releases a pulse of unknown energy with catastrophic results. Scientists in their laboratories search desperately for a solution to the broken fabric of existence, but they are already too late, the sanctity of the grave has been sundered. There is no virus or bacteria to combat, just chaos and horror as a million graveyards expel their tenants from eternal slumber. The world is unaware of the impending apocalypse, realisation only dawns with the appearance of the mouldering corpses who devour everything they encounter. Governments crumble and armies are scattered to the wind. Kurt Taylor, a self-employed plumber, witnesses the start of the horrifying outbreak. Desperate to reach his family before they fall victim to the ever growing horde of shambling corruption, he flees the scene, watching the unfolding cannibalism and destruction in his rear view mirror. In a society with few guns, how can people hope to survive the endless waves of zombies that seek to consume every living thing? With ingenuity, planning and everyday materials, the group forge their way and strike back at the Hellspawn legions. Rescues are mounted, but not all survivors are benevolent. The evil that is in all men has been given free rein in this new, dead world. With both the living and dead to contend with, is there any hope for the Taylor family?

    It’s time to tear down and start again. And what better way to eradicate humanity than by unleashing the monsters inside each of us? Destroying mankind is simple compared to perfecting a new version of mankind. Just as evil resides within all of us, the hero does as well. It’s just much harder to bring out. The Chosen are those few who survive the process. They become greater in every regard. The other 98% however, become the stuff of nightmares. Wickedly cunning and ferociously strong, they are insatiable demons that make the average zombie look like it's made of sticks and string.Into this cataclysm Bryce Carter is thrown wearing nothing but a hospital gown. He dared to defy Magnus, who felt injecting him with the serum just wasn’t punishment enough. Barefoot and bleeding, Bryce has to fight his way out of a city overrun with zombies.Led by the demons, the dead sweep across the streets like a grey river, forcing him to crawl through sewers and down into the dark tunnels beneath the blood-soaked streets. He’s hounded relentlessly and growing desperate as he only has so much time. Nuclear weapons are being readied and soon the city will be nothing but dust and ash.

    This seventh volume trade paperback reprints issues twenty-five through twenty-eight of the critically acclaimed and Eisner Award winning series - Stray Bullets Truly horrifying The kidnapping and nightmarish search for Virginia Applejack The Collected Stray Bullets Series is a perfect introduction for new readers, a great way for fans to complete the series.

    Falkenberg. But instead of impressing the teacher, Jessie's name ends up on the Naughty Board! Will Jessie go from teacher's pest to teacher's pet? Or will the Naughty Board prevail? This hilarious junior novel includes eight-page of full-color photos from the show.

    CHILL as Lady Deadpool and Headpool try to find the root cause of their majorly abusive frenemieship. Then THRILL as Kidpool and Dogpool embark on a 100-ton mechanized joy ride and and uhm...GET ILL as Dogpool makes a brand-new archenemy. Then it's 'Two Mutants and a Baby' in the untold story of how Cable escaped from Alaska with Hope. Wait -- You don't think Cable did that alone, did you? PLUS: Deadpool struggles to find the perfect way to honor his pal Cable.

    The men and women of Safe Haven have been preparing for any-and-all end of world scenarios for years. However, their bunkers, weapons and training can't save them from the one threat they never could have expected: Their own children.

    Out past the poisoned wasteland lives a man even the Nightcrawlers and Organ People fear. Some name him Joe Glow, others call him the Meltdown Man. But his name…is Geiger.

    It is only after a series of violent events occur that Ryan realizes he must set aside all he believes to be true in order to face his shocking and inevitable reality.