P. Kelner, editors of Home Improvement: Undead Edition? Your worst school nightmares—taking that math test you never studied for, finding yourself naked in school assembly, not knowing which door to enter—will pale in comparison to these thirteen original stories that take academic anxiety to whole new realms. In #1 New York Times bestselling author Charlaine Harris’s story, "Playing Possum," Sookie Stackhouse brings enough birthday cupcakes for her nephew's entire class but finds she's one short when the angry ex-boyfriend of the school secretary shows up. When her guardian, Kate Daniels, sends her undercover to a school for exceptional children, teenaged Julie learns an all-new definition of "exceptional," in New York Times bestselling author Ilona Andrews's "Magic Tests." For those who like fangs with their forensics, New York Times bestselling author Nancy Holder offers "VSI," in which FBI agent Claire is tested as never before in a school for Vampire Scene Investigation. And in New York Times bestselling author Thomas Sniegoski's "The Bad Hour," Remy Chandler and his dog Marlowe find evil unleashed in an obedience school. You'll need more than an apple to stave off the creatures in these and nine other stories. Remember your first lesson: resistance is fruitless! Includes stories by: ILONA ANDREWS, AMBER BENSON, RHYS BOWEN, MIKE CAREY, CHARLAINE HARRIS, DONALD HARSTAD, STEVE HOCKENSMITH, NANCY HOLDER, FAITH HUNTER, TONI L.P. KELNER, MARJORIE LIU, JONATHAN MABERRY, THOMAS SNIEGOSKI

    He runs across a barker with a strange power over the crowd: attractive women leave their men and disappear into an unmarked tent, never to be seen again, and the men wander away, forgetting that they ever had girlfriends or wives. When Granuaile falls under the barker’s influence and enters the tent, Atticus isn’t about to forget it and move on. He and his Irish wolfhound, Oberon, pursue her and discover the horrifying secret to the carnival’s success.

    All you need to know is that this is a world that includes angels and vampires as well as humans.For GH series readers, this story is set after Archangel’s Shadows and contains some spoilers for earlier books in the series.

    But when her wild niece, Vetta, runs off to Devil’s Gate, a lawless town that has sprung up overnight in a modern-day gold rush, she knows she has to extricate her before the rebellious girl gets into real trouble. Though she’s confident in her head snakes’ ability to defend her against attackers, Seremela is still a bit nervous about braving this modern-day Wild West by herself.Vampyre Duncan Turner is not about to let his new co-worker go into that chaos alone. His Vampyric power and lawyer smarts make him the perfect ally, and the fact that he already had his eye on Seremela for more…personal reasons, doesn’t hurt matters. Any romantic thoughts pull up short, however, when they arrive at Devil’s Gate and learn Vetta is set to hang by morning.In order to save Vetta and themselves, Seremela and Duncan are going to have to fight fire with force and magic with fangs. And pray they make it out of Devil’s Gate alive.

    Helping her on the mission are her hot mage partner, her Mischief demon minion, and a Vanity demon named Valva. The problem? She's got to figure out how to find her sister without letting her enemies know she's back in town. But when Sabina seeks out an old ally -- a vampire strip club owner named Fang -- for help, Sabina learns the hard way that Vanity demons don't know the meaning of the phrase "low profile."Word count: ~7,500

    Even so, when she somehow acquires a stalker, Layla Rue is surprised to find that Sean is the only one she can trust.Her Best Enemy by USA TODAY bestselling author Maggie ShayneKiley Brigham refuses to believe there's a ghost in her house, but when an unseen hand leaves a bloody message on her bathroom mirror, she's forced to turn to local psychic Jack McCain. As the two work to uncover a long-buried secret, Kiley finds that she's haunted not by spirits, but by thoughts of Jack.Someone Else's Shadow by Locus Award-winning author Barbara HamblyMaddie Laveau worries about her young roommate, Tessa, when she stays late to practice ballet in the old Glendower Building -- and when Tessa goes missing, Maddie enlists mysterious tenant Phil Anderson to help. But is Phil the white knight she needs, or the predator she fears?

    The only problem is — she's no wolf. Called a curse, a witch and the Daughter of Evil by the superstitious wolves, Jessica decides to fight for her freedom, at age nineteen, the only way she can — in the ring.When she's brutally attacked right after her fight, is it enough to finally earn her freedom off Compound, or will she be forced to endure the hatred even longer...

    They know just the right spell to kill a man with one kiss—or raise him back again. And they’re not afraid to exact sweet revenge on those who dare to cross them. But what if you’re the unlucky soul who falls victim to a conjurer’s curse? And if you had the power to cast a magic spell of your own, would you use it?In this bewitching collection, nine of today’s hottest paranormal authors tell all-new, otherworldly tales.  Spellbinding stories featuring bigfoot, albino vampires, professional wizards, resurrected boyfriends and even a sex droid from the twenty-third century named Silicon Lily.  But as our conjurers are about to discover, it’s all fun and games until someone gets hexed.  And sometimes, even the best spun spells can lead to complete and utter mayhem. Includes:Retribution Clause by Ilona AndrewsBigfoot on Campus by Jim ButcherHolly’s Balm by Rachel CaineSnow Job by Carole Nelson DouglasOutside The Box by P. N. ElrodHow Do You Feel? by Simon R. GreenThere Will Be Demons by Lori HandelandCherry Kisses by Erica HayesThe Arcane Art of Misdirection by Carrie VaughnLength: 13 hours and 8 minutes

    These days, women are quite capable of solving their own problems and slaying their own dragons (or demons, as the case may be).In this all-new anthology, Kerrie L. Hughes and New York Times bestselling author Rachel Caine have collected original stories from thirteen of today’s most exciting urban fantasy and paranormal authors. Each story features a strong heroine who kicks butt and takes names in a dangerous world and makes that world a better place for everyone in it—except the bad guys, of course. And if she finds a bit of romance along the way, well, a little heat warms the heart and sharpens the mind…just as long as the man can keep up. Includes: Shiny by Rachel CaineIn Venito Veras by Karen ChanceHunt by Rachel VincentMonsters by Lilith SaintcrowVampires Prefer Blondes by P.N. ElrodNine-Tenths of the Law by Jenna BlackDouble Dead by Cheyenne McCrayA Rose by Any Other Name Would Still be Red by Elizabeth A. VaughnSuperman by Jeanne C. SteinMonster Mash by Carole Nelson DouglasWanted: Dead or Alive by L.A. BanksMist by Susan KrinardBeyond the Pale by Nancy Holden

    He only knew that he had not found it.Shadow Moon has been away from America for nearly two years. His nights are broken with dangerous dreams. Sometimes he almost believes he doesn't care if he ever returns home.In the Highlands of Scotland, where the sky is pale white and it feels as remote as any place can possibly be, the beautiful and the wealthy gather at a grand old house in the glen. And when the strange local doctor offers him work at the party, Shadow is intrigued. He knows there is no good reason for him to be there. So what do they want with him?

    Anderson, and Rob Thurman—nothing is as simple as black and white, light and dark, good and evil..Unfortunately, that’s exactly what makes it so easy to cross the line.In #1 New York Times bestselling author Jim Butcher’s Cold Case, Molly Carpenter—Harry Dresden’s apprentice-turned-Winter Lady—must collect a tribute from a remote Fae colony and discovers that even if you’re a good girl, sometimes you have to be bad...New York Times bestselling author Seanan McGuire’s Sleepover finds half-succubus Elsie Harrington kidnapped by a group of desperate teenage boys. Not for anything “weird.” They just need her to rescue a little girl from the boogeyman. No biggie.In New York Times bestselling Kevin J. Anderson’s Eye of Newt, Zombie P.I. Dan Shamble’s latest client is a panicky lizard missing an eye who thinks someone wants him dead. But the truth is that someone only wants him for a very special dinner...And New York Times bestselling author Rob Thurman’s infernally heroic Caliban Leandros takes a trip down memory lane as he deals wih some overdue—and nightmarish—vengeance involving some quite nasty Impossible Monsters .ALSO INCLUDES STORIES BYTanya Huff * Kat Richardson * Jim C. Hines * Anton Strout * Lucy A. Snyder * Kristine Kathryn Rusch * Erik Scott de Bie *From the Trade Paperback edition.

    It's like I dropped a heroic dose of acid and turned on the Food Network for eight hours. It's funny and demented and sticks in you like a pinbone. Matt Wallace writes like someone just jammed a needle full of adrenaline in his heart - and then, in yours. From this point forward, I'll read anything this guy writes."-Chuck Wendig, author of BLACKBIRDS and ZER0ES"No one makes me think, 'Dammit, I should have thought of that!' like Matt Wallace. The Sin du Jour series is something I read with equal amounts of envy and delight." - Mur Lafferty, Campbell Award winning author of THE SHAMBLING GUIDE TO NEW YORK CITY

    1. A Questionable Client (Kate Daniels, #0.5) by Ilona Andrews: Kate Daniels guards shifter Saiman, less trustworthy than the enemy.2. Even Hand (Dresden Files, #11.6) by Jim Butcher: "Gentleman" John Marcone, Chicago's most dangerous crime lord, fights water demon with defenses against White Council wizard Harry Dresden. 3. The Beacon by Shannon K. Butcher: Hereditary fighter faces monster that killed his father and town, with a little girl that attracts said monster. 4. Even a Rabbit Will Bite by Rachel Caine: Liesl trains the new Dragonslayer before she faces the last dragon.5. Dark Lady (Vampire Files, #12.75) by P.N. Elrod: Vampire nightclub owner Jack Fleming promises radio to resident ghost.6. Beknighted by Deidre Knight: Artist tries to free knight painted in real gold.7. Shifting Star (Signs of the Zodiac, #4.6) by Vicki Peterson: Skamar, Tibetan for star, newly created tulpa, fights another vicious male of Tulpa. 8. Rookwood & Mrs King by Lilith Saintcrow: Vampire private eye is hired by wife to kill the woman's vampire husband. 9. God's Creatures (Kitty Norville, #0.8) by Carrie Vaughn: Cormac follows a werewolf to convent school.

    Elrod, Caitlin Kittredge, Marjorie M. Liu, Katie MacAlister, Lilith Saintcrow & Ronda Thompson.What newly married couple doesn't dream of a romantic retreat where they can escape the world for a while — but what happens when supernatural forces intrude on their wedded bliss? Nine of today’s hottest paranormal authors answer that question in this all-star collection of supernatural stories. Can a vampire-hunter enjoy her honeymoon after learning that her new hubby is a werewolf? How can newlyweds focus on their wedding night when their honeymoon suite is haunted by feuding ghosts? And what’s a wizard to do when a gruesome monster kidnaps the bride on her way home from the wedding? With so much otherworldly mayhem awaiting our newlyweds, will they ever get around to the honeymoon itself? Find out in...My Big Fat Supernatural Honeymoon.Contents:Stalked / Kelley Armstrong --Heorot / Jim Butcher --Roman holiday, or SPQ-arrrrrr / Rachel Caine --Her mother's daughter / P.N. Elrod --Newlydeads / Caitlin Kittredge --Where the heart lives / Marjorie M. Liu --Cat got your tongue? / Katie MacAlister --Half of being married / Lilith Saintcrow --A wulf in groom's clothing / Ronda Thompson.

    In "Seeing Eye" by Patricia Briggs, a blind witch helps sexy werewolf Tom Franklin find his missing brother—and helps him in more ways than either of them ever suspected. And in Jim Butcher's "Last Call," wizard Harry Dresden takes on the darkest of dark powers—the ones who dare to mess with this favorite beer.For anyone who's ever wondered what lies beyond the limits of reality, who's imagined the secret spaces where witches wield fearsome magic, come and drink deep. Let yourself fall under the spell of this bewitching collection of short stories!