Featuring illustrations by Joe Bennett, it is a story full of realistic self-love affirmations for all of us who are just trying to get by, until we die.“It’s funny, it's dark, and there's a lion wearing pants. If you only read one more book before the world ends, make it this one.”—Brooke Barker, New York Times bestselling author of Sad Animal Facts“Oh man. This is a sweet yet sad, heartwarming yet heartbreaking read. I loved it! And it’s so wonderfully funny!” —Martin Starr“I Will Not Die Alone is a delightful and necessary hand-hold from a friend that steadies your pulse in the face of ultimate anxiety. Joe Bennett presents the finite and the infinite through a deeply optimistic lens that's far from cloying and makes you feel really good inside. His characters are relatable, funny, and rich with detail in a snapshot.” —Sunita Mani“I Will Not Die Alone, is poignant, smart, and oddly both a little alarming and comforting. This book is a must read for anyone trying to survive through this decade and will have you laughing through your tears.” —Loryn Brantz, bestselling author of Feminist Baby “Joe Bennett always knows how to find the depth in the shallow things, bringing our attention along with his to see what’s been profound all along, right there, in the profane.” —Brad Neely

    Providing you with the antidote to every annoying little thing, these rules are not made to be broken.488 Rules for Life is not a self-help book, because it's not you who needs help, it's other people. Whether they're walking and texting, asphyxiating you on public transport with their noxious perfume cloud, or leaving one useless square of toilet paper on the roll, a lot of people just don't know the rules. But thanks to Kitty Flanagan's comprehensive guide to modern behaviour, our world will soon be a much better place. A place where people don't ruin the fruit salad by putting banana in it … where your co-workers respect your olfactory system and don't reheat their fish curry in the office microwave ... where middle aged men don't have ponytails …What started as a joke on Kitty Flanagan's popular segment on ABC TV's The Weekly, is now a quintessential reference book with the power to change society. (Or, at least, make it a bit less irritating.) What people are (Kitty Flanagan is) saying about this book: 'You're welcome everyone.''Thank god for me.''I'd rather be sad and lonely, but right.''There's not actually 488 rules in here but it sure feels like it'.

    Be amused and appalled as Tony discovers his parents are censoring bare breasts from the National Geographic, has his braces repossessed by the government, gets caught two-timing his local video shop, attempts to start a band with no musical skill whatsoever, mars an awards night with a burst of foul language, and returns to his hometown to discover his grandfather is not the man he thought he was.A Nest of Occasionals is a series of supersize set pieces from a life lived in miniature. But what on earth does that title mean? There’s only one way to find out…

    Wiggling out of every predicament in unique and unexpected ways, this poet-jester reminds us of Birbal at the court of Akbar. Read his tales and laugh with joy even as his plain common sense leaves you gasping.

    As a young married couple, Andrew and Anne work together to make the very best of their property, High Peaks, but at what cost to their happiness? In time, the property will pass to their son, David. Handsome and hardworking, David is determined to become the best sheepdog handler in the land. Nothing is going to stand in his way-not even the beautiful Catriona Campbell, daughter of the wealthy graziers next door. The Call Of The High Country is an inspiring and heartwarming saga of a family battling through hard times, of a love that defies all odds, and of dreams that won't be broken.

    The cruel bon mot which has its sting drawn from the laughter that ensues. It was Oscar Wilde who pointed out that no comment was in bad taste if it was amusing - and if for that reason alone it is worth while preserving these delightful examples of verbal dexterity.

    Who "they" were and what they did to warrant their boss' stinging disapproval is precisely what this book is about. This is a book about the media like no other. How exactly do you kill a TV network that for three decades dominated the Australian television and media landscape?With Kerry Packer at the helm, and with a host of stars and personalities that made it the envy of its rivals, Channel 9 dominated the airwaves, consistently winning the ratings battle and fostering a unique esprit de corps within its ranks. But in a few short years, it's gone from top dog to also ran – with rock bottom morale, mass redundancies and a resurgent opposition mainly staffed with vengeful former Nine management. Where does the blame lie, and who's brave enough to expose the dysfunction, mismanagement and more than occasional act of bastardry that reads as a how-to of how not to run a business?In this extraordinary book, Gerald Stone gives a truly eye-opening inside account of the death of a television network. The result is a drama far more riveting than anything on television, played out by an incredible cast of characters, most of them household names, some of them business legends, and all of them as you've never, ever seen them before.

    The book is a “pornographic illustrated story about furniture” (according to the cover). According to reviews, there is nothing overtly sexual in the illustrations, although innuendos (and strategically deployed urns and tree branches) abound. The New York Times Book Review described it as “Gorey’s naughty, hilarious travesty of lust.” Gorey has stated that he intended to satirize Story of O.

    With colorful art and oh-so-relatable scenarios, Working from Home with a Cat takes readers through a day in the life of artist Heidi Moreno and her pet cat Peanut. From the time she wakes up until the time she goes to bed, she navigates working with her needy yet loveable feline companion, as Peanut walks over her paintings, hogs her chair, disrupts her yoga routine, and more.Despite all the struggles, cats like Peanut are always by our side when we need them, even on the hardest, loneliest workdays. Working from Home with a Cat reminds us why cats are the cutest colleagues and a source of comfort and calm in this chaotic world.• Perfect gift for any cat owner• Features funny and heartwarming scenarios anyone who has tried to concentrate at home with a cat has experienced• For readers who like How to Tell if Your Cat is Plotting to Kill You, Herding Cats by Sarah Scribbles, and You Need More Sleep: Advice from Cats by Francesco Marciuliano

    

    Cartoonists Jerry Scott and Jim Borgman have captured the humor of that challenging time with Zits, in which they chronicle the life and times of the typically exasperating yet ever lovable Jeremy Duncan.In this first Zits treasury, a compilation of Zits and Growth Spurt, faithful fans of Jeremy's world will get a glimpse behind the scenes with never-before-seen sketches and the stories behind the strips. Sunday cartoons appear in full-color, highlighting the strip's acclaimed drawing style.Even though the teenage terrain is rocky, Zits is warm and sympathetic. "The highest compliment we hear from readers is, 'You must have a camera hidden in our house!'" says Borgman.

    The hilarity of TheOatmeal.com is now presented in book form with 35 never-before-seen pieces and 25 classic favorites from the Web site, including 6 Types of Crappy Hugs and 17 Things Worth Knowing about Your Cat.In Matthew Inman's New York Times best selling 5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth (And Other Useful Guides), samurai sword-wielding kittens and hamsters that love .50-caliber machine guns commingle with a cracked out Tyrannosaur that is extremely hard to potty train. Bacon is better than true love and you may awake in the middle of the night to find your nephew nibbling on your toes.Inman creates these quirky scenes for theoatmeal.com, which launched in July 2009 and already has more than 82 million page views. In fact, every 15 to 30 seconds, someone Googles one of theoatmeal.com's creations. Now, 60 of Inman's comic illustrations and life-bending guides are presented in full-color inside 5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth (And Other Useful Guides). Consider such handy advice as: 4 Reasons to Carry a Shovel at All Times, 6 Types of Crappy Hugs, 8 Ways to Tell if Your Loved One Plans to Eat You, 17 Things Worth Knowing About Your Cat, and 20 Things Worth Knowing About Beer.

    Never in my wildest imaginings did I expect it would happen when I was on all fours vomiting my guts out beside a sugar cane field in far north Queensland on Mother’s Day.” And so begins another brilliantly funny instalment in the true and chaotic life of middle-aged stand up comic, Denise Scott. This time Denise is on tour through the back blocks and remote country towns of regional Australia with a bunch of young male comics on a tiny bus… Although old enough to be their mother, Denise in true form manages to keep up with the partying and outrageous behaviour (and many times leading it) on tour. However, although that tiny bus took her many miles away from her real life, life has a habit of catching up with you. It was mid journey on those long, long stretches of empty road that Denise confronts her own issues of ageing, motherhood, sex, intimacy, regret, and wearing your bathing suit in public.

    The economy is collapsing, his health is failing, and around his hometown of Broughty Ferry, Bob is struggling to get the respect he deserves. Fortunately his email junk folder is bursting with offers of assistance from around the world. In these genuine emails, Bob Servant looks to the Internet's worst con merchants and charlatans for answers to his many woes. The author of the bestselling Delete This At Your Peril and the critically acclaimed Radio 4 series The Bob Servant Emails is back with an all-new compilation of emails targeting a fresh batch of email spammers—the false lenders who have bravely stepped into the credit crunch, supposed doctors offering expensive treatments for Bob's ailments, and fake foreign soldiers offering him military advice in his campaign against a local bowling club. They all find a man from Broughty Ferry who is ready and willing to give them his valuable time.

    I like it when you say things like 'let's pretend we're in a tunnel'. I like it when you suggest we crawl. I like it when you extinguish the lights. I do not like it when you bite me.