“You’re about as useful as a windshield wiper on a goat’s butt.” Keep this book handy, someday you’ll be glad you have it. “Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you just be yourself.” Pick any of the many jaw-dropping insults then laugh at the look on your adversary’s face when you whip one out and use it on them. You’ll leave no doubt in their mind that you are a master of sarcastic insults! ADDED BONUS: In addition to the fresh and hilarious insults in this book, you’ll also find great sarcastic observations about life hidden inside this book’s pages, like… “I think the reason so many people have smart phones is because opposites attract!” You’re no idiot, so you need this book to start your new life as the master of sarcastic insults and put-downs! “Hey! Who left the Idiot Box open? Now they're everywhere!”

    

    The Funniest Text Message Autocorrects, Wrong Numbers & Mishaps on Smartphones!

    James Bond isn't a secret agent. The funny bone isn't a bone. E-readers like the Kindle were invented in 1949. Slavery has never been more common as it is today. Neanderthals were extremely smart and were able to speak. Vikings invented rap battles. Natural oranges aren't orange. Rats didn't cause the Black Death. Halitosis doesn't exist. Buddhists don't worship Buddha. Everyone mispronounces "Nutella." St. Patrick wasn't Irish. There has never been 50 states in the United States. Selfies aren't a recent fad. They have existed since 1839. Guardian angels aren't mentioned in the Bible. A comatose person can speak and walk around. Nicotine doesn't cause cancer.

    Covering Sid's early years in South Africa and life as a ladies' hairdresser, his obsession with gambling and women, his questioning by Scotland Yard in a murder case, Hancock's Half Hour and the Carry On films, and Sid's death on stage at the age of 63, Cliff Goodwin reveals the amazing truth behing the legend.

    Norman Baker said that about his autobiography. Why? He was a jackass. In the pages of this book meet 20 losers, killers, confidence tricksters, and incompetents - the Jackasses of History. For adult readers.

     Based on linguistic science and proven techniques, this book guides you through a series of Chapters taking 5-10 minutes each, progressively introducing new characters and pronunciation rules so you come away reading 9 words of Korean in 60 minutes. Set your stopwatch, progress through the lessons, and come away reading Korean in less than the time it takes to watch a movie. Leave your time in the comments as a review to prove the skeptics wrong! More than 10 thousand students have learned to read Korean with us, and now it’s your turn. • 5 Chapters: 5036 words, additional review exercises, bonus notes, mneomnic devices and full explanations • Free Online Learning: Blog posts, vocabulary, and lessons at www.90daykorean.com/blog To learn more visit 90daykorean.com. WHAT OUR CUSTOMERS ARE SAYING: “I'm just soooooooooooooo thankful! You're AMAZING! The challenge was incredible. I never thought that learning Hangul was so easy! -Sarah Son, France" THE 90 DAY KOREAN SATISFACTION GUARANTEE: Feel confident with a 100% Satisfaction Guarantee backed for 30 days. If you are not happy with the guide, simply contact us for a full refund. WANT AN EASIER WAY TO READ KOREAN? EASILY MEMORIZE, GET PAST YOUR STICKING POINTS, STOP USING ROMANIZATION, SPEED UP YOUR STUDIES, AND GET STARTED LEARNING KOREAN by adding the new book "Learn to READ KOREAN: The Ultimate Crash Course to LEARNING HANGUL Through Psychological Associations to your bookshelf TODAY!

    I just want to be known as a clown because to me that's the height of my profession. It means you can do everything-sing, dance, and above all, make people laugh.” – Red Skelton “All I want to do is to make people laugh, to take the word ‘heartache’ out of their vocabulary” – Red Skelton A lot of ink has been spilled covering the lives of history’s most influential figures, but how much of the forest is lost for the trees? In Charles River Editors’ American Legends series, readers can get caught up to speed on the lives of America’s most important men and women in the time it takes to finish a commute, while learning interesting facts long forgotten or never known. Among radio personalities and television entertainers, almost nobody had a career as long or storied as Red Skelton, one of America’s foremost comedians during the 20th century. Over the course of 70 years, Skelton made crowds laugh from vaudeville to performing as a clown, and while he is best known for The Red Skelton Show and his other variety shows, he also managed a 45 year stage career, as a pantomime or one of the other characters he created over the years. Although Skelton was extremely popular in America at the peak of his career, his entertainment was also a throwback to the early 20th century, which compelled television studios to balk at the notion of continuing to air his shows by 1970, even though his shows had spent almost two straight decades with Top 10 ratings on the air. Understandably bitter, Skelton refused to have his shows in syndication until the 1980s, and by then, the same concerns about his appeal to younger crowds had only gotten worse as he and his show had aged. Skelton is still best remembered for his performances and his television career, but he was also a noted artist who fittingly excelled at depicting clowns on canvas. Despite the seemingly silly content of his work, Skelton’s skills as an artist were so impressive that he made millions of dollars a year selling his art and having it displayed. By the time he died in 1997, it’s estimated that he may have made more money through art than through performing. American Legends: The Life of Red Skelton chronicles the life and career of one of America’s most beloved comedians. Along with pictures of important people, places, and events, you will learn about Red Skelton like never before, in no time at all.

    

    Still wet behind the ears, he found himself on a whirlwind tour through the seven ages of man and the 57 varieties of human nature. He has to learn how to examine real people, diagnose them without becoming emotionally involved and fend off the crises of confidence which await around every corner. The book is set in the 1970s and there will no doubt be some readers who might think that things were better then. Edward Vernon is a pen name of a well known British doctor/author. Here's what the critics said about the series: Delightfully and wittily written. His descriptions of daunting receptionists, magazine-strewn waiting rooms and hypochondriacal patients will strike many familiar cords, but Dr Vernon is at his best when recounting his encounters in the surgery and at the bedside. For anyone needing to be entertained, and at times moved, there could be no better prescription than one chapter...taken each night at bedtime - Liverpool Echo Truthful, well observed and consistently readable - Daily Telegraph The funniest of the funny doctor books - Richard Gordon Dr Vernon is onto a good thing; we could do with some more - Oxford Times Hilarious - Titbits Thoroughly delightful - Fresno Bee Delightfully funny - Sunday Advocate, Baton Rouge For entertainment, a chapter or two before bedtime is just what the doctor ordered - Sacromento Bee Does for British GPs what Herriot has done for vets - Booklist Hilarious - Grimsby Evening Telegraph Very funny - Citizen, Gloucester Genuinely funny - South Wales Echo Wise, funny, sad and heartwarming - Chattanooga Times Good fun - Homes and Gardens Jolly good reading - Publishers Weekly Views the human species he treats with much the same affection, compassion and humour as Herriot brings to the animal world - Cleveland Plain Dealer Sometimes serious, sometimes hilarious - Lancashire Evening Post Will amuse, amaze and entertain - Yorkshire Post etc etc

    Grab your copy of Secret Hollywood and start gossiping!

    Learn the Alphabet and pronunciation as well as useful phrases in 8 categories, such as greetings, travel and directions, making friends to business and emergencies. Download, read and enjoy your vacation like never before.

    Dumb crooks, celebrities gone bad, unsolved mysteries, odd laws, and more—Strange Crime has plenty of stories that will make you ask yourself, “What could they possibly have been thinking?” This easily portable paperback book is ideal for readers on the go. Take it to school, to work, to jury duty!

    As you identify your tribe and divinely align in time with God's calendar, you will discover how to find your position in God's Kingdom, how to war effectively for your inheritance, and then walk in His blessings.A Time to Advance: Understanding the Significance of the Hebrew Tribes and Months will help you understand how God is developing His whole conquering army for today. You will also understand how each part moves together, and the redemptive quality of God's covenant plan for Israel. This will help ground you on how we are grafted into a movement in days ahead.As you learn how to think like God thinks and study the Hebrew tribes and months, you will receive prophetic understanding of how the Lord orders your steps throughout the year. You will also see your place in God's next Triumphant Reserve that is rising in the Earth today!

    After losing their small business and life savings to the government’s unfathomable shutdown, the author and her husband are forced to sell their home and move into a travel trailer. Still reeling from financial loss and the deaths of two of their beloved dogs, the pair embark on a new life in a trailer park, populated with some of the most unconventional characters you’d ever hope not to meet. There’s Gretchen, the park’s unsympathetic and conniving manager, and her puny, perverted husband, Lloyd, who “maintains” the park grounds and who gives pool algae a bad name. Daisy and Lonnie May are the author’s closest neighbors, and are, perhaps, the park’s most devoted couple. Only Daisy May happens to be Lonnie’s dog. Trailer Dogs will make you laugh, cry, and maybe even a little angry. But it will never make you bored.