Back in six months whatever you do. Or three days, like last time.' Camilla Long on Nigel Farage'You're as ugly as a salad.' Bulgarian insult'I'm going to beat him so bad he'll need a shoehorn to put his hat on.' Muhammed AliThere's no pleasure like a perfectly-turned put-down (when it's directed at somebody else, of course) but Matthew Parris's Scorn is sharply different from the standard collections. Here are the funniest, sharpest, rudest and most devastating insults in history, from ancient Roman graffiti to the battlefields of Twitter. Drawing on bile from such masters as Dorothy Parker, Elizabeth I, Donald Trump, Groucho Marx, Princess Anne, Winston Churchill, Nigel Farage, Mae West and Alastair Campbell - which form an exchange between voices down the ages - Scorn shows that abuse can be an art form. This collection includes extended literary invective as well as short verbal shin-kicks. Encompassing literature, art, politics, showbiz, marriage, gender, nationality and religion, Matthew Parris's sublime collection is the perfect companion for the festive season, whether you're searching for the perfect elegant riposte, the rudest polite letter ever written, or a brutal verbal sledgehammer.

    Weatherbee as principal of Riverdale High, the formation of Moose and Midge's relationship (and Reggie's subsequent schemes to split them up), and other Archie staples! So get your Homecoming dress, pack your brand-new backpack, and pick up your school map to find your way to the biggest Archie story of the year!

    Beautiful, perfect Tranai, a perfect utopia, where wealth is distributed without governmental intervention, based on individual choice, and there is no poverty…

    Everyone who has ever left home for the first time only to find that the world outside is strange and overwhelming will love Bone.

    His preferred medium is the spoken word, and his audience has been limited to hard-bitten reporters and hard-core watchers of C-SPAN. Just as The Iliad and The Odyssey were spoken aloud by many bards, in many variations, before Homer captured them on paper, the Rumsfeld improvisations have finally met up with their perfect editor/enabler. Hart Seely, coeditor of O Holy Cow! The Selected Verse of Phil Rizzuto, uncovers the gems hidden within hundreds of hours of Rumsfeld commentary, in the form of Zen verse, haiku, sonnets, lyric poetry, and free verse. In addition, Seely's sharp sleuthing has uncovered two thematic collections: Rumsfeld's Songs of Myself, and Nine Poems on the Media. The result is a hilarious and irreverently revealing book both by and about one of the world's most powerful men.

    Over 455 million people have seen and/or heard the first two editions of High School Musical. The third installment, which debuted on October 24th, grossed $42 million in its opening weekend, breaking the record for the largest opening weekend for a musical film. In High School Musical 3, starring Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens, the Wildcats are facing senior year and their impending graduation. Our songbook features 11 songs from the soundtrack plus lots of photos. Includes: The Boys Are Back * Can I Have This Dance * High School Musical * I Want It All * Just Wanna Be with You * Last Chance * A Night to Remember * Now or Never * Right Here Right Now * Scream * Walk Away.

    But when Steven spends their life savings on a cemetery plot, it's time for Maggie to take control.With her twenty-year high school reunion just around the corner and her long-lost high school boyfriend back in town, it's Maggie's turn to start turning heads. In the face of small-minded gossips, a surly family, and a meddling grandmother, Maggie must reach deep inside her Southern-housewife soul to become the woman she's always wanted to be.

    Her strip is poignant and funny--and very often, universal. She captures a mother's frustration at an unruly teenager, a father's surprise in a growing daughter, and kids' various views about their future as they grow up.In It's the Thought That Counts, For Better or For Worse looks back on many of the series' high points through Lynn's hand-picked selection of color Sundays: the unexpected birth of baby April in 1991; the daring revelation that teenage family friend Lawrence was gay; the fear that comes with aging parents. The collection also includes those quietly funny moments in families: a father and his kids romping with abandon; a closet full of clothes that no longer span a middle-aged girth; a teenage son's first experience with a crush.Lynn Johnston fashioned the Patterson family after her own lively brood. Her real life experiences--divorce, childbirth, pets, and parents--show through in her work in the most wise and wonderful ways. Even better, this anniversary book contains Johnston's comments about some of her favorite strips in an amusing and informative narrative.

    ARCHIE 1000 PAGE COMICS CELEBRATION collects 1000 pages of iconic Archie tales in this one amazing volume! Follow America's favorite red-head as he navigates the pressures of the American teenager in the awkward, charming, and hilarious way you've come to know and love.

    The lead character in most is Bitchy Bitch, the perma-nently PMS'd and PO'd embodiment of the female id, who also stars in her own series of cartoon shorts on the Oxygen Network's X-Chromosome animated series.The raunchiest collection, focusing on Bitchy's sexual excapades.

    A special part 2 collection of hilarious tales about Tinkle's best-loved comic character - Suppandi, the goof, whose antics leave his bosses bothered and bewildered.

    Rex enters a downward spiral of drugs and depravity in a quest to resurrect his career and save his soul. Over budget and behind schedule on Presidents Day, he is backed into a corner by bad publicity, a crap project, and studio politics. But enlisting serial-killer-turned-murder-consultant Darwin, his trusty assistant Igor, narcotics from Doctor Love, and the lovely actress Coconut, T. Rex will stop at nothing in his quest for cinematic fame and glory. God help us all.

    From that outpost, he gained a reputation for his factual but funny magazine articles and wrote the book, How to be a Hermit , his first bestseller. His last, The Decline and Fall of Practically Everybody , was left unfinished after Cuppy's death in 1949 and has become a classic of American humor. In between (among other titles) was this very funny collection. First published in 1931, the subjects include "What I Hate About Spring," "Awful Mammals," and "Why Be a Rhinoceros?" Great for anyone who loves classic American humor.

    Now Ethel declares she is an all-powerful being from another galaxy, and that together the two will save the world.

    A reluctant father, shameless adulterer, and devotee of all things extravagant, Gordon lives an exclusive life filled with fine wines and surrounded by servants and mistresses. It would seem to be a world without want.So when revelations about his scandalous relationships and less than honest business practices emerge, the glamorous façade begins to crumble and those around him start to fear the worst. But, much to Gordon’s surprise, all he can feel is relief.The Fall and Rise of Gordon Coppinger is a brilliant and often extremely funny examination of modern British values and the craving for a public fall from grace. In a world that is built on the crazy principles of wealth and celebrity, and which is driven by the insatiable desire to attain more and more, we meet the perfect anti-hero: Gordon Coppinger, a man going quietly sane.