Unfortunately, due to an exercise allergy, and an eating obsession, it isn’t going to be as easy as he first thought. Throw in a battle of wits with his neighbour’s cat over toilet rights to his garden, a son who lives in the shed and dreams of being discovered on The X Factor, a stroppy teenage daughter with a Wayne Rooney fixation, a wife who doesn’t want to sleep with him anymore, and an amorous work colleague who does, and you have all the ingredients to Sex, Lies and Chocolate Cakes: The Secret Eater’s Diary.

    Dozens of warmongering ogres. Hundreds of dynamite-wielding gnomes. And one normal guy in the middle of it all. Bad mornings. We've all had 'em. But what if you woke up in a post-apocalyptic land filled with wizards, dragons, and ogres? Not only that, but you woke up as a prisoner of a clan of mages who don’t even speak your language? What if these guys expected you to know magic, but left you to figure out for yourself how to cast it? These are the problems Isaac must solve. And what's he going to do when death knocks on his door? He's going to blast a fireball through the letterbox and send death running. But first...he just needs to learn how to even cast a fireball. Follow his journey through a land filled with creatures that want to kill him, and watch as he refuses to let them. Accompany him into a land of mystery and danger, where life is tough and learning spells and skills takes work. A land where Isaac is determined to stop being the prey and become the predator. This is his journey to make allies and friends in this new world. A journey through battles against slaver ogres and wingless dragons and gnome dictators. Through experimentation and adaptation, where he learns that killing one enemy helps him against the next. It’s also his journey to find a warm, comfy bed. This is the tale of a someone who used to be a normal guy. It's Isaac’s tale of adapting to a world where everything is worth killing. Over 500 pages of fast-moving fantasy, set in a brutal apocalyptic world. This is a mesmerizing story about one guy's quest for power and survival, with light litrpg/game-like elements and a focus on him learning how to use magic. 'Amazing - I love it because of how original it is. This is a hidden gem. The story is good and I'm enjoying the style.' - Early Reviewer 'A breath of fresh air. Isaac is not some over-powered or genius guy. He is just a dude trying to survive in the cruel world he was thrown in, and he is trying to make head and tail of what is going on.' - Early reviewer 'Enjoyable - I especially like the rationality of the main character and how he approaches problems. Unique, definitely worth reading.' - Early reviewer.

    There is a better way.Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting brings the joy back into family life and helps parents to raise confident, responsible adults. Based on her forty-plus years of experience, behavioral specialist Noël Janis-Norton outlines a clear, step-by-step plan that will help any parent raise a child who is cooperative and considerate, confident and self-reliant. Transform your family life with these five strategies: Descriptive Praise, Preparing for Success, Reflective Listening, Never Ask Twice and Rewards and Consequences. You’ll begin to see results almost immediately: • Kids start cooperating the first time you ask • Mornings, bedtimes, mealtimes and homework all become easier • Even very resistant kids start saying” yes” instead of “no” Full of examples and real stories from parents, this book gives you the complete tool-kit to achieve Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting.

    '101 Knock Knock Jokes for Kids', a fun, funny, and often cheesy joke book. </h2><br>101 Knock Knock Jokes for Kids is a wonderful, natural way for children to improve their reading. They are able to practice their reading skills whilst enjoying themselves.<br><br>Joke books for kids have the added benefit of improving memories, and importantly, instilling confidence. Children are given a great reason to talk in front of groups and with practice are able to feel comfortable doing it.<br><br>Joke books for kids on kindle are also a fun way for a family to interact, laughing - or moaning - at the jokes.<br><br><br><h2> Reviews for IP Factly joke books: </h2><br><b> Child appropriate jokes, April 24 By A-J (Australia) </b> Amazon Verified Purchase<br>This review is from: 101 Jokes for Kids (Joke Books for Kids) (Kindle Edition)<br>Got it for my son's 10th birthday, he loved it and I love the fact it gets him reading. I personally can't comment on the content as we have just spent 4 hours on the road, many of them listening to these jokes!<br><br><b> Substitute Teachers Take Note, March 29, 2013 By Donna Galloway </b> Amazon Verified Purchase<br>This review is from: 101 Knock Knock Jokes for Kids (Joke Books for Kids) (Kindle Edition)<br>This is fun and the elementary kids that I sub like to call it up and use it for our free time or great for indoor recess. I am afraid that I will need a new set of 101's before too long, the kids are learning these!<br><br><b> Happy grandkid, March 11, 2013 By Priscilla Branham </b> Amazon Verified Purchase<br>This review is from: 101 Jokes for Kids (Joke Books for Kids) (Kindle Edition)<br>I bought this for my grand child. He loved reading it on the kindle. He was trying the jokes out on all the family members.<br><br><b> My son loves 'em., February 22, 2013 By James Leonard </b> Amazon Verified Purchase<br>This review is from: 101 Knock Knock Jokes for Kids (Joke Books for Kids) (Kindle Edition)<br>My six year old gets a kick out of these corny little knock knock jokes. It entertains him, and makes him laugh.<br><br><h2> IP Factly 'Joke Books for Kids' series includes: </h2><br>'101 Doctor Doctor Jokes for Kids'<br>'101 Elephant Jokes for Kids'<br>'101 Jokes for Kids'<br>'101 More Jokes for Kids'<br>'101 Bird Jokes for Kids'<br>'101 Creepy Crawly Jokes for Kids'<br>'101 Knock Knock Jokes for Kids'<br>'101 More Knock Knock Jokes for Kids'<br>'101 Jokes for Kids DOUBLE PACK'<br>'101 Knock Knock Jokes for Kids DOUBLE PACK'<br><br><b> Scroll up and Buy this book now - your child will love going back to it again and again.</b>

    Sometimes funny, sometimes poignant, this is the story of a young woman's accidental career as a cocktail lounge piano player, and the adventures and encounters that follow.

    His plan is to infiltrate the science fair at Hubble Middle School, located in a Maryland suburb just outside Washington. The rich kids at Hubble cheat by buying their projects every year, and Grdankl's cronies should have no problem selling them his government-corrupting software. But this year, Toby Harbinger, a regular kid with Discount Warehouse shoes, is determined to win the $5,000 prize—even if he has to go up against terrorists to do it. With the help of his best friends, Tamara and Micah, Toby takes on Assistant Principal Paul Parmit, aka "The Armpit", a laser-eyed stuffed owl, and two eBay buyers named Darth and the Wookiee who seem to think that the Harrison-Ford-signed BlasTech DL-44 blaster Toby sold them is a counterfeit. What transpires is a hilarious adventure filled with mystery, suspense, and levitating frogs.

    Enjoy a variety of heat levels from these rogues and the heroines that get them hot under the collar. Grab your copy for a bargain price or for FREE in Kindle Unlimited!Rogues Like It Hot includes:Act of Pardon by Sandra SookooA Marquess for Convenience by Biance BlythePrince of Rogues by Angelique ArmaeA Reversal of Fortune by Rose PearsonThe Scottish Governess by Arietta RichmondHer Gentleman Pirate by Tamara GillThe Duke's House Party Match by Kelly Anne BruceTo Capture Love by Shereen VedamSinful Deeds by Samantha Holt

    The Underminer makes you feel suicidal. But the Underminer is your friend...Mike Albo and Virginia Heffernan do us all a public service by capturing the elusive evils of an age-old archetype. To understand and resist your toxic friend, you need The Underminer.

    

    Jack is chosen by Notch for an extremely secret mission called 'Project Z'. This mission is very dangerous and there is no promise of success but this mission is essential for the future of the Minecraft world. Rare, dark and guarded secrets of Minecraft will be revealed in this action packed saga. So what are you waiting for? Grab this book now for FREE with kindle unlimited.

    Leo had many friends and he loved to play with everyone. He especially loved to play with Rose, a Lioness about the same age as him and with Crown , a younger lion cub. The only problem was that when Leo’s friends did something wrong , Leo didn’t want to forgive them. Leo’s Father, who was the pack leader, teaches him the value of forgiveness and why he shouldn't hold a grudge. Author Efrat Haddi is taking young children on a journey with Leo and his friends while they learn a very important lesson." The Forgiving Lion " helps to teach children an important social skill that can make home life happier and school more successful. It also provides parents, teachers, and counselors with an entertaining way to teach children why they should forgive others..This well-written and inspiring story, delivers easy-to-digest education complemented by vibrant, delightful illustrationsThis story may be ideal for reading to your kids at bedtime and enjoyable for the whole family as well! It is suitable as a read aloud book for preschoolers or a self-read book for older children.** Don't forget to get your FREE GIFT inside **

    

    Russian President Volkov is obsessed with rebuilding the Russian Empire - by any means necessary. To reassert Russia’s sphere of influence the Russian Federal Security Service (FSB) forge a historical Vatican Concordat with Hitler. Lorenzo Rossi, head of the Vatican Police, is sent to recover the Concordat before it falls into the wrong hands. Rossi follows a deadly trail across Europe that leads him to the doorstep of the Russian Kremlin. Rossi is ably assisted throughout by Cathy Doherty, a CIA Agent with a passion for all things Russian. Together they set out to establish the origins of the Concordat, and its intended purpose. Will Rossi be able to recover the Concordat and flee Russia with his life?

    Races operating within their own planetary systems are to be left alone until they begin to develop the ability to travel at FTL (faster than light speeds). When the ability to travel at FTL becomes apparent, one of the members of the Federation is nominated to help ease the newcomer through the Galactic citizenship process. Unfortunately, not all the galaxies systems belong to the Federation, and some of those systems are much less than friendly. The last several decades have seen the development of war like societies that systematically loot developing planets. They take the water, and other precious resources, including slaves, leaving the remaining native inhabitants a barren planet. Without resources the population simply dies a slow death. The Egolari are here because we, meaning the people of Earth, happen to possess a skill set and an aptitude that is critical to the needs of the Federation. The major problem within the Federation is that virtually all the members have, for centuries been living in peace. They have developed a society that is not well suited to counter the growing violence presented by the nonaligned races. In short, they have no way to protect themselves, let alone protect the fledgling races just arriving on the galactic scene. Enter Earth. Of all the emerging races to become future galactic members, one has a superior potential to face the violence threatened by the nonaligned races. You guessed it, Humanity. The Federation realized that to continue to function as an organized galactic society, they would have to develop a military arm that could provide the Federation and emerging systems the protection of a fleet of space vessels and marines. Humanity was the race most capable of leading the development of that military organization because we had not progressed so far that our war like tendencies had begun to erode. Although we were not yet ready for galactic membership, we were a necessity that could fill the need, thus we were getting a crash course in how to travel the galaxy, protecting ourselves and the Federation with the full expectation that we would go where no human has gone before, and kick some alien ass.